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WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
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[CAR DOOR CREAKS, SLAMS]
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["THE FIRE THAT KEEPS YOU WARM" PLAYING]
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♪♪
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♪ Hey, hey, hey ♪
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♪ Let me walk in the
sunshine of your smile ♪
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♪ Let me hide in the
shadows of your eyes ♪
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♪ Of your eyes ♪
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♪ Let me lie in the
safety of your arms ♪
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Hey, good morning, Lynette.
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How's the cult going? Has it turned yet,
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or are you guys still in
the peace and love phase?
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- Nice one, Jack.
- Thank you.
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But just so you know, you
are the one that's blowing it.
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- How so?
- Spirit week.
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- It's 70's day. We play Prairie tomorrow.
- _
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Okay, so you're doing a
whole new look just because
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of a stupid school rivalry. Why?
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Basic idea is that it's fun.
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Also, to be honest, I really
hope we beat them by a lot,
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and hope their bus
crashes into the swamp.
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Gosh, it must be exhausting
pretending to care about stuff.
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Nope. Not exhausting at all.
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Suck it Prairie!
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Oh, suck it Prairie!
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- Yeah!
- Oh, this guy.
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Jack, happy Spirit Week. My
favorite week of the year...
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oh, well, it would be
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if we can just beat
the Prairie Rams once
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- during my regime.
- Wait, wait, wait.
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- They're the Rams too?
- Yeah.
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That's why it's called the Ram Cup,
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as I was telling you last night.
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Right, right. Speaking of,
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thanks for helping
move my old fridge out.
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I really appreciate that. Yeah.
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And your delts are thanking you as well.
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- Really?
- Yeah. Yeah.
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- Uh-oh.
- [LAUGHS]
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Well, you know, anytime
you need an old appliance
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moved to the curb, you let me know,
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or we could go to the gym and you know,
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lift weights for real.
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That could be cool,
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- assuming no one there is mean.
- Right, right.
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Hey, since you offered,
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I do need some help
moving in my new fridge.
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All I require is my usual payment
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of 2.5 beers and a full sesh of B.S..
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[LAUGHS] You got it, pal. Thank you.
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Oh, and don't forget about
my birthday dinner tonight,
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7:00 p.m. sharp at Mancy's.
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Oh, yes, that's right. Yeah, tonight.
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- Mm-hmm.
- Okay. Yeah. Okay.
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[DOOR OPENS]
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Hi, birthday boy.
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Don't make a big deal out of it, okay?
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[SING-SONG] I wouldn't go in there
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if I were you.
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Oh, my God.
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Okay. Mm-hmm.
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Guys, you did not have
to do this. I am very...
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- [THROWING UP]
- Blessed.
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Oh God, no, please, Helen.
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You were supposed to keep people out.
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Oh God, don't look at me.
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Don't look at my body! [CRIES]
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He came in fifth in the
snow crab eating contest.
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Turns out all the
snow crabs were rotten.
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Helen, why did you tell
me not to come in here
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in such a sing-song-y voice?
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I don't know, maybe it's 'cause
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you're my favorite person
in the whole wide world.
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[SING-SONG] I wouldn't
look in that garbage can
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behind you if I were you.
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- Fine.
- [LAUGHS]
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[THROWS UP]
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Someone's a little dense.
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- Ugh!
- Oh!
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♪ Next time I'll listen to my heart ♪
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♪ Next time, well I'll be smart ♪
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♪ A.P. Bio 2x12 ♪
Ride the Ram
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- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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[CLOCK TICKING]
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[DOOR OPENS]
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Shh.
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[JAUNTY CLOCK-LIKE MUSIC]
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♪♪
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Huh.
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Today, guys, I need excuses I can use
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to ditch a birthday party.
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Just tell your mom there
will be drugs at the party.
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Then your mom will call their mom
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- and it'll get canceled.
- That was you?
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You could say you are memorizing
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portions of the Torah for a bar mitzvah.
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Mm, mm-hmm.
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Again, guys, this
would be me saying this,
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an adult Gentile.
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So, I actually use
this one all the time.
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So you pour a glass
of water on your shoes
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and then you tell people
that your sister's water broke
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right before you got there,
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and they'll be like,
"Well, why don't you
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go be there with her at the hospital?"
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And then you jet, baby.
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Hmm, interesting. Uh, anyone else?
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Mr. G, whose party is it?
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So, Durbin helped move
my fridge the other day,
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and he's leveraging that
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into a forced appearance
at his birthday thing.
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He helped you move your fridge?
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- Mm-hmm.
- And furthermore,
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he's inviting you to a party?
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That's two good things:
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moving the fridge as one
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and an invitation to a party as two.
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Two good things.
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You have to go if he helped
you move your fridge.
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Yeah, okay. All right,
I get it, I get it.
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Thank you.
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All right, well, I guess I gotta
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at least make an appearance, you know?
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Especially since I need his help moving
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my new fridge in tomorrow.
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Ah, let's see. Sarika, make a list
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of reasons to leave
Durbin's stupid party early.
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All right, everybody call
out those reasons again.
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Uh, there's the drug one,
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the Jewish one...
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Just sit regular and it'll be fine.
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And...
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Well, we did our part to win
the Spirit Week blood drive.
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You know, if we won,
it'd make Durbin so happy.
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Plus, we got these free cookies.
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[LAUGHTER]
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It's so much fun to
spoil Durbs once a year.
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I spent the last three
months working on a banner
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for the basketball game.
I hope he likes it.
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- ALL: Oh!
- Nice. Unrelated:
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I found us three
Barbara Streisand tickets.
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- Oh!
- Eh, eh.
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I won't seat above mezzanine.
I plan on dancing big
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and I don't need some Mom telling me
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that I'm blocking the
view for her sick son.
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Em, I think that was a one-time thing.
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- Yeah?
- Oh, shoot, my phone is dying.
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- Oh, plug it in!
- It's okay.
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- Go.
- We have got to see this.
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- Mm-hmm.
- I can't believe the Mom
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from "Meet the Fockers"
is gonna try and sing.
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- [LAUGHS]
- Sorry, classroom TV.
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What up?
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Hi, I'm looking for the Durbin party.
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- Mr. Griffin?
- Yeah.
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So nice of you to show up.
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That sweet man has been
waiting for over an hour.
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Oh, no.
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Please tell me I'm not this late
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for a one-on-one birthday dinner.
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Yep.
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Agh.
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[ANIMATED MUSIC]
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- Hi.
- Jack, you're here.
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Yeah, um, I made it. [LAUGHS]
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Thank you. Yeah, I'm so sorry I'm late.
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I, ah, I was um...
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I had to study the Torah.
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Oh, you are converting to Judaism?
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I had no idea.
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Yeah, no, I'm... I'm
just considering it.
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You know, they want me pretty bad.
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- Well... [LAUGHS]
- [LAUGHS] Yeah.
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So is it really just you and me, man?
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Yeah, every year, for my birthday,
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I invite one friend
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so we can really talk, and this year,
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you are that friend.
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Well, I am honored. [LAUGHS]
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Can I get you started with anything?
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Yeah, no, I can be
probably be ready soon.
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Birthday boy, you want to go first?
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No, Jack, you go ahead.
I'm having surgery tomorrow,
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so I can't have any food after 8:00.
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That's why I made the
reservation for 7:00.
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Oh, my God. You're
having surgery tomorrow?
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Super early. Reverse vasectomy.
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Kind of a birthday present for myself.
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Oh, gosh, everything you're saying
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is making me very sad.
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No, no, it should make you feel happy.
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- Oh.
- I'm reclaiming my virility.
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[CLEARS THROAT]
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I'm gonna give you some more time.
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No. no, no.
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He is gonna have a ribeye and a martini.
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Nothing for me, of course.
At least I can see and smell
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and maybe touch my favorite meal.
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Oh, well... [LAUGHS] Okay.
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- Ah.
- So...
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What's in the bag?
201
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The b... Oh.
202
00:07:19,229 --> 00:07:20,561
Uh, that's your birthday present.
203
00:07:20,563 --> 00:07:21,595
What?
204
00:07:21,856 --> 00:07:23,856
Yeah. Yeah, I had to.
205
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Just from the bookstore
across the street.
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00:07:25,401 --> 00:07:26,499
Jack.
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00:07:29,272 --> 00:07:33,907
"A Bayesian Perspective on Queeny".
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00:07:33,909 --> 00:07:35,342
- Quine.
- Quine.
209
00:07:35,344 --> 00:07:36,844
- Yeah. He was a philosopher.
- Oh!
210
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I just learned two things.
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I thought maybe you would love that.
212
00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:42,046
No one has ever given
me anything like this.
213
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- I cannot wait.
- Yeah...
214
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- I'm gonna save the bag.
- Cool.
215
00:07:46,869 --> 00:07:49,563
Ah, so... Yeah. Yeah.
216
00:07:50,126 --> 00:07:53,127
[PIANO MUSIC]
217
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[LOUD SWALLOWING]
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[ANIMATED MUSIC]
219
00:07:59,301 --> 00:08:01,468
♪♪
220
00:08:01,470 --> 00:08:03,237
[PHONE CHIMES]
221
00:08:03,239 --> 00:08:06,073
I got the Streisand tickets! [LAUGHS]
222
00:08:06,075 --> 00:08:08,041
Yes. Okay.
223
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All right.
224
00:08:10,045 --> 00:08:12,879
[REFRIGERATOR WHIRRS]
225
00:08:12,881 --> 00:08:13,980
♪♪
226
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Oh no!
227
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:18,865
That's gonna be some hot blood.
228
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♪♪
229
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- Ooh, that is cutting nice.
- It is. Ah, God.
230
00:08:28,897 --> 00:08:30,329
Are you sure you don't want a bite?
231
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Oh, I wish. It's too risky.
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00:08:32,351 --> 00:08:34,484
It's only a couple of
hours before they re-doodle
233
00:08:34,509 --> 00:08:36,402
- my noodle.
- [LAUGHS]
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They're you gonna
tinker with your dinker.
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They are gonna let loose my baby juice!
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ALL: ♪ Happy birthday to... ♪
237
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I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.
238
00:08:47,945 --> 00:08:50,345
I just... I can't believe I just
239
00:08:50,652 --> 00:08:52,919
talked about my junk to the wait staff.
240
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Here, let me make a wish.
241
00:08:55,022 --> 00:08:56,621
Hang on, no, it's still happened.
242
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- [LAUGHS]
- Here, you know what?
243
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You can thank my doodle
for this, 'cause I can't eat it.
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00:09:00,127 --> 00:09:01,526
[BOTH LAUGH]
245
00:09:01,528 --> 00:09:03,361
[BELL RINGS]
246
00:09:03,363 --> 00:09:04,804
I heard the hicks from Prairie
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00:09:04,829 --> 00:09:06,309
are gonna toilet paper Whitlock tonight.
248
00:09:06,333 --> 00:09:08,292
Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!
249
00:09:08,317 --> 00:09:10,601
We should kidnap their
peppiest cheerleader
250
00:09:10,603 --> 00:09:12,270
and put her in a glass case.
251
00:09:12,578 --> 00:09:14,078
You guys talking about Prairie?
252
00:09:14,780 --> 00:09:17,015
I got mixed up with one
of those Prairie hicks.
253
00:09:17,532 --> 00:09:20,568
It was the summer. 2017.
254
00:09:22,090 --> 00:09:24,498
I met Chaz Gurd at 4-H.
255
00:09:24,523 --> 00:09:28,691
He had a pond... rowboat,
frogs, the whole deal.
256
00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,561
We skinny dipped in the moonlight
257
00:09:31,263 --> 00:09:33,165
and held each other as the black night
258
00:09:33,190 --> 00:09:34,393
bore down upon us.
259
00:09:34,418 --> 00:09:36,073
Okay, we get it. All right.
260
00:09:37,835 --> 00:09:39,935
[DOOR OPENS]
261
00:09:42,274 --> 00:09:44,018
[LAUGHS] Guys, you are
not gonna believe this.
262
00:09:44,042 --> 00:09:45,708
I had the best time
263
00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:47,250
at Durbin's birthday thing last night.
264
00:09:48,464 --> 00:09:50,398
Huh, what's this?
Principal Durbin came by
265
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,889
and returned your book.
He seemed pretty upset.
266
00:09:52,914 --> 00:09:54,908
I think he might have been crying...
267
00:09:55,036 --> 00:09:57,469
- and limping.
- Oh, no.
268
00:09:57,722 --> 00:09:59,822
What did you do this time, Jack?
269
00:09:59,824 --> 00:10:02,347
Well, Marissa, I...
270
00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:05,027
I left a very incriminating bookmark
271
00:10:05,029 --> 00:10:07,931
in the book I panicked-gifted to Durbin.
272
00:10:10,034 --> 00:10:11,167
Ooh!
273
00:10:14,030 --> 00:10:16,532
This is a bad sucky feeling. [LAUGHS]
274
00:10:16,534 --> 00:10:17,957
It's just an all-around
275
00:10:17,982 --> 00:10:20,355
crappy, sucky-ass situation,
276
00:10:20,380 --> 00:10:22,755
and there's nothing that can be done.
277
00:10:23,943 --> 00:10:26,375
- You could apologize.
- Nah.
278
00:10:26,377 --> 00:10:28,461
No. No, I thought about that,
279
00:10:28,486 --> 00:10:31,336
but it kind of doesn't
work in real life, you know.
280
00:10:31,361 --> 00:10:33,416
You're right boss. It doesn't work.
281
00:10:33,717 --> 00:10:36,818
I tried apologizing to Chaz Gurd
for breaking his heart,
282
00:10:37,053 --> 00:10:38,293
but he keeps sending me
283
00:10:38,318 --> 00:10:39,988
shirtless photos on his tractor.
284
00:10:40,467 --> 00:10:42,391
Counterpoint. It worked when I wet
285
00:10:42,416 --> 00:10:44,581
my younger brother's
bed from beneath it.
286
00:10:44,606 --> 00:10:45,672
He forgave me.
287
00:10:45,697 --> 00:10:47,192
You wet his bed from underneath?
288
00:10:47,674 --> 00:10:48,774
How did...?
289
00:10:49,103 --> 00:10:51,080
I'm not gonna discuss it any further.
290
00:10:51,105 --> 00:10:52,172
Yeah.
291
00:10:54,127 --> 00:10:57,390
Ah, hey, Helen, is, um, Ralph in?
292
00:10:57,415 --> 00:10:58,514
No, he's at the morgue!
293
00:10:58,516 --> 00:11:00,182
He didn't make it through surgery.
294
00:11:00,184 --> 00:11:01,884
Helen, let me handle this.
295
00:11:01,886 --> 00:11:04,354
And could you get some more crotch ice
296
00:11:04,356 --> 00:11:06,132
for my paper underpants, please?
297
00:11:06,997 --> 00:11:09,402
Mr. Griffin, can I help you?
298
00:11:09,845 --> 00:11:11,928
Ah, do you mind if we...?
299
00:11:16,167 --> 00:11:18,033
[LOUD TYPING]
300
00:11:27,345 --> 00:11:28,695
Ralph, I am, um...
301
00:11:29,613 --> 00:11:32,114
I'm so sorry. Man, really, I...
302
00:11:32,116 --> 00:11:33,448
I wasn't trying to get out
303
00:11:33,450 --> 00:11:34,516
of a one-on-one dinner with you.
304
00:11:34,518 --> 00:11:35,650
I need you to know that.
305
00:11:35,652 --> 00:11:36,901
I thought it was going to
be a whole big group thing...
306
00:11:36,925 --> 00:11:39,323
- Ralph, it's not about that.
- Jack, Jack, it's okay.
307
00:11:39,685 --> 00:11:42,370
Hey, I realized that this friendship
308
00:11:42,860 --> 00:11:44,860
is... it's fool's gold.
309
00:11:44,862 --> 00:11:46,561
Th-there's no gold in this river,
310
00:11:46,563 --> 00:11:49,231
so I'm gonna pack up my pan and shovel,
311
00:11:49,233 --> 00:11:51,533
and my sluice boxes
and my suction dredges,
312
00:11:51,535 --> 00:11:52,802
and I'm gonna move on.
313
00:11:53,404 --> 00:11:54,905
You're reading about gold panning?
314
00:11:56,540 --> 00:11:57,639
Maybe.
315
00:11:58,162 --> 00:12:00,320
But that's something
I would tell a friend,
316
00:12:00,931 --> 00:12:02,031
not a coworker.
317
00:12:02,941 --> 00:12:04,441
Have a good day, Mr. Griffin.
318
00:12:08,851 --> 00:12:09,951
Okay.
319
00:12:11,994 --> 00:12:13,828
[SIGHS]
320
00:12:20,102 --> 00:12:21,132
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
321
00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:22,172
Oh God!
322
00:12:22,197 --> 00:12:23,331
Have a good day, Mr. Griffin.
323
00:12:23,333 --> 00:12:24,878
I know. Ralph, I'm... she's...
324
00:12:25,668 --> 00:12:26,934
All right, I'm going.
325
00:12:26,936 --> 00:12:28,265
I'm gonna...
326
00:12:29,505 --> 00:12:32,239
♪♪
327
00:12:32,241 --> 00:12:34,308
[BELL RINGS]
328
00:12:34,310 --> 00:12:37,286
[ANIMATED MUSIC]
329
00:12:37,311 --> 00:12:38,312
♪♪
330
00:12:38,314 --> 00:12:39,513
Ladies, do you see that?
331
00:12:39,515 --> 00:12:41,582
Do you see that blood being thrown out?
332
00:12:41,584 --> 00:12:43,718
I did that. I ruined that blood.
333
00:12:43,743 --> 00:12:45,519
I unplugged the fridge
to charge my phone.
334
00:12:45,521 --> 00:12:48,355
You ruined a full day
of blood donations?
335
00:12:48,357 --> 00:12:49,904
Don't say it like I meant to do it.
336
00:12:49,929 --> 00:12:50,958
It was a mistake.
337
00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:52,326
We have to catch Whitlock up,
338
00:12:52,328 --> 00:12:54,194
or we're gonna lose
to those Prairie hicks.
339
00:12:54,196 --> 00:12:56,163
We need to find more donors stat.
340
00:12:56,165 --> 00:12:58,510
I hear you need blood!
341
00:13:00,936 --> 00:13:03,035
We are winning this blood drive,
342
00:13:03,037 --> 00:13:05,825
and I will be God dang
if Jack is gonna ruin
343
00:13:05,850 --> 00:13:08,040
Spirit Week and Ralph's birthday.
344
00:13:09,148 --> 00:13:10,209
Drain me.
345
00:13:10,594 --> 00:13:13,546
Are you sure? You've
already given twice.
346
00:13:13,548 --> 00:13:16,215
Oh, honey, I'm a regular
tomato soup factory.
347
00:13:16,217 --> 00:13:18,184
I gonna make myself go to sleep
348
00:13:18,186 --> 00:13:20,679
and you tell them to
just keep on taking it.
349
00:13:21,623 --> 00:13:24,557
- Okay.
- All right.
350
00:13:24,559 --> 00:13:25,605
- Hey.
- Hey.
351
00:13:25,918 --> 00:13:27,727
Word on the street is Durbin hates you.
352
00:13:27,729 --> 00:13:29,562
Oh, yeah, yeah, it's a little rough.
353
00:13:29,564 --> 00:13:31,163
You know I lost my principal friend,
354
00:13:31,165 --> 00:13:32,634
and just when he was about to hook me up
355
00:13:32,658 --> 00:13:34,291
with JV volleyball tickets.
356
00:13:34,635 --> 00:13:35,968
Bummer, man. Front row too.
357
00:13:36,570 --> 00:13:39,337
You know, Jack, this
whole detached routine
358
00:13:39,339 --> 00:13:40,873
is getting a little boring.
359
00:13:41,288 --> 00:13:42,987
I know you care about Durbin.
360
00:13:43,076 --> 00:13:45,243
Isn't it exhausting
pretending that you don't?
361
00:13:45,245 --> 00:13:47,185
Not exhausting. Suck it, Prairie.
362
00:13:48,930 --> 00:13:50,930
What? Where are you going?
363
00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:51,988
Wait.
364
00:13:52,585 --> 00:13:55,586
[DRUM MUSIC]
365
00:13:55,588 --> 00:13:57,755
♪♪
366
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,049
Thank you.
367
00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:02,265
- Thanks.
- Enjoy the game.
368
00:14:02,290 --> 00:14:03,790
And I can now announce
369
00:14:03,792 --> 00:14:06,516
that Prairie has won the tug of war!
370
00:14:06,541 --> 00:14:08,961
[APPLAUSE]
371
00:14:10,198 --> 00:14:11,225
Oh my God, Mary!
372
00:14:11,225 --> 00:14:13,800
That's the most beautiful
thing I've ever seen.
373
00:14:13,802 --> 00:14:15,501
Ooh, I should get a
quick pic for Durbin.
374
00:14:15,503 --> 00:14:18,124
He hasn't seen it yet. I
guess he's in the bathroom.
375
00:14:18,607 --> 00:14:21,674
- [ANIMATED MUSIC]
- Oh!
376
00:14:22,477 --> 00:14:25,278
Ah, I was trying to
find the dang camera app.
377
00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:27,249
Why did I put it in a folder?
378
00:14:27,483 --> 00:14:29,615
And now for the results of this year's
379
00:14:29,617 --> 00:14:31,650
Spirit Week blood drive challenge.
380
00:14:31,652 --> 00:14:33,986
The winner is... the Whitlock Rams!
381
00:14:33,988 --> 00:14:35,687
[APPLAUSE]
382
00:14:35,689 --> 00:14:37,889
Oh my God, Helen, you did it.
383
00:14:37,891 --> 00:14:39,390
You gave so much blood
384
00:14:39,392 --> 00:14:40,792
that you won the blood drive for us.
385
00:14:40,816 --> 00:14:42,470
Oh, that's so great.
386
00:14:42,495 --> 00:14:46,502
All right, next up, we've
got the mascot dunk contest.
387
00:14:46,527 --> 00:14:49,987
First up, Helen DeMarcus
as the Whitlock Ram.
388
00:14:50,012 --> 00:14:51,079
That's me.
389
00:14:53,073 --> 00:14:55,540
I have a quick question.
Are we in a tunnel?
390
00:14:55,542 --> 00:14:56,837
No, we're in a gym.
391
00:14:56,862 --> 00:14:59,915
And you are not falling
down toward me from above?
392
00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:02,147
- You sure you wanna do this?
- Oh, yeah, I'm good.
393
00:15:02,448 --> 00:15:03,549
Okay.
394
00:15:06,146 --> 00:15:07,518
For Durbin.
395
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:09,086
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
396
00:15:09,088 --> 00:15:11,722
Okay, Helen, you've got this.
397
00:15:11,724 --> 00:15:12,995
Stay focused.
398
00:15:14,426 --> 00:15:15,762
All right, here we go.
399
00:15:16,929 --> 00:15:19,730
No!
400
00:15:19,732 --> 00:15:22,566
[DISTORTED] This is not good!
401
00:15:22,568 --> 00:15:24,869
Holy...!
402
00:15:24,871 --> 00:15:27,171
[SHATTERED GLASS]
403
00:15:29,742 --> 00:15:30,841
Font!
404
00:15:30,943 --> 00:15:32,543
[CROWD MURMURING]
405
00:15:32,798 --> 00:15:34,439
What do you think? Low two?
406
00:15:34,464 --> 00:15:35,496
Two?
407
00:15:36,082 --> 00:15:37,681
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
408
00:15:37,683 --> 00:15:40,684
[ANIMATED MUSIC]
409
00:15:40,686 --> 00:15:43,687
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
410
00:15:43,689 --> 00:15:45,760
♪♪
411
00:15:53,531 --> 00:15:55,932
[DOORBELL RINGS]
412
00:16:00,592 --> 00:16:02,472
Ah, yo, a little help here?
413
00:16:03,185 --> 00:16:04,585
Ask one of your friends, dummy.
414
00:16:04,776 --> 00:16:06,543
See you. Wouldn't want to be you.
415
00:16:31,636 --> 00:16:33,736
[HEAVY BREATHING, GRUNTS]
416
00:16:38,643 --> 00:16:41,644
[ANIMATED DRUM MUSIC]
417
00:16:41,646 --> 00:16:45,781
CROWD: Five, four, three, two, one!
418
00:16:45,783 --> 00:16:47,850
- [BUZZER SOUNDS]
- [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
419
00:16:47,852 --> 00:16:50,185
And Prairie beats Whitlock,
420
00:16:50,187 --> 00:16:53,989
74 to 9.
421
00:16:53,991 --> 00:16:55,758
That was in poor taste.
422
00:16:56,410 --> 00:16:57,876
Damn, we got housed.
423
00:16:59,663 --> 00:17:02,765
Well, it all comes down
to this, ladies and gents.
424
00:17:02,790 --> 00:17:05,022
It's the principal showdown,
425
00:17:05,047 --> 00:17:06,935
featuring Principal Durbin
426
00:17:06,937 --> 00:17:08,171
from Whitlock High,
427
00:17:09,673 --> 00:17:13,859
versus Dr. Stumpf, from Prairie High!
428
00:17:15,453 --> 00:17:17,178
Remember, the principals don't know
429
00:17:17,180 --> 00:17:19,013
what the mystery challenge is.
430
00:17:19,015 --> 00:17:21,149
Will it be a battle of wits?
431
00:17:21,305 --> 00:17:26,154
No! It's riding mechanical rams...
432
00:17:26,156 --> 00:17:28,890
- Oh my God.
- From hell!
433
00:17:28,892 --> 00:17:30,057
[ENGINE ROARING]
434
00:17:30,059 --> 00:17:31,575
What the hell?
435
00:17:32,896 --> 00:17:35,697
Whichever principal
stays on longer wins.
436
00:17:35,699 --> 00:17:36,769
No.
437
00:17:38,234 --> 00:17:41,242
Ralph, you cannot do this.
Your tubes are too tender.
438
00:17:41,267 --> 00:17:44,238
Helen, I have to. I can tough it out
439
00:17:44,240 --> 00:17:45,973
- for Whitlock.
- Hey, Ralph.
440
00:17:45,975 --> 00:17:48,123
This does not concern you, Mr. Griffin.
441
00:17:48,148 --> 00:17:50,812
Come on, Durbin, time
for you to lose again.
442
00:17:50,814 --> 00:17:52,895
Tenth year in a row for you to lose,
443
00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:55,982
you loser. [LAUGHS]
444
00:17:56,686 --> 00:17:58,885
Ralph, you cannot do
this. He can't do this.
445
00:17:58,887 --> 00:18:03,010
That means Whitlock forfeits
and loses the Ram Cup.
446
00:18:03,035 --> 00:18:04,275
Hold on a second. Hold on.
447
00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:05,359
What if, uh...?
448
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:08,541
What if I ride the bull
instead of Principal Durbin?
449
00:18:08,566 --> 00:18:10,263
You know, for medical reasons.
450
00:18:10,455 --> 00:18:14,768
That is some [BLEEP]
typical Whitlock [BLEEP].
451
00:18:14,770 --> 00:18:16,570
Eh, let me see.
452
00:18:17,095 --> 00:18:18,462
Jack, what are you doing?
453
00:18:18,487 --> 00:18:20,526
I'm not gonna help you move
your new fridge in your house.
454
00:18:20,550 --> 00:18:22,187
My new fridge is in,
don't worry about it.
455
00:18:22,211 --> 00:18:24,547
I'm doing this for you, pal.
So, you can, you know,
456
00:18:24,572 --> 00:18:26,247
let loose you baby juice, remember?
457
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:28,014
From the restaurant dinner?
458
00:18:28,016 --> 00:18:31,286
I agree to let you ride if I can have
459
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:33,120
a designated rider as well.
460
00:18:33,755 --> 00:18:35,906
- Yeah. That seems fair.
- Ah.
461
00:18:37,047 --> 00:18:38,103
Hey, Chaz.
462
00:18:39,260 --> 00:18:41,627
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
463
00:18:41,629 --> 00:18:45,197
Alright from Prairie
High, third year senior
464
00:18:45,199 --> 00:18:48,768
and semi-professional
bull rider, Chaz Gurd.
465
00:18:48,770 --> 00:18:51,371
Yeah! Let's go!
466
00:18:51,373 --> 00:18:53,773
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
467
00:18:53,775 --> 00:18:55,875
- Is that?
- Yep.
468
00:18:55,877 --> 00:19:00,747
And from Whitlock,
middle-aged A.P. Bio teacher
469
00:19:00,749 --> 00:19:03,215
Jack Griffin!
470
00:19:03,217 --> 00:19:05,284
- Middle-aged?
- That's what it says.
471
00:19:05,286 --> 00:19:07,286
Come on, man. I'm, you know.
472
00:19:07,288 --> 00:19:09,255
I crap bigger than you.
473
00:19:09,257 --> 00:19:10,877
Come on, dude, that's
from "City Slickers".
474
00:19:10,901 --> 00:19:11,991
- Eh?
- [SPITS]
475
00:19:12,456 --> 00:19:13,525
Oh.
476
00:19:16,163 --> 00:19:19,298
[ENGINES REV]
477
00:19:19,300 --> 00:19:24,303
And here we go!
478
00:19:24,305 --> 00:19:26,238
Let's go! Get up!
479
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,408
CROWD: Ride the ram! Ride the ram!
480
00:19:29,410 --> 00:19:32,344
Ride the ram! Ride the ram!
481
00:19:32,346 --> 00:19:35,281
Ride the ram! Ride the ram!
482
00:19:35,283 --> 00:19:38,349
[CHEERS]
483
00:19:39,753 --> 00:19:44,456
On your mark, get set... ride!
484
00:19:45,426 --> 00:19:47,859
- [LAUGHS]
- [INDISTINCT]
485
00:19:47,861 --> 00:19:50,429
[ENGINE ROARING]
486
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:56,635
Don't worry. I got this.
487
00:19:58,305 --> 00:20:01,940
Chaz. [VOICE ECHOING]
488
00:20:01,942 --> 00:20:04,943
[SOFT GUITAR MUSIC]
489
00:20:04,945 --> 00:20:09,347
♪♪
490
00:20:09,349 --> 00:20:13,017
- Oops.
- Heather?
491
00:20:13,019 --> 00:20:15,353
♪♪
492
00:20:15,355 --> 00:20:18,189
Come to me.
493
00:20:22,996 --> 00:20:24,895
And Chaz Gurd has been thrown!
494
00:20:24,897 --> 00:20:27,498
Whitlock High are the 2019 Champions!
495
00:20:27,500 --> 00:20:30,168
- Yes.
- Whoo-hoo!
496
00:20:30,170 --> 00:20:32,903
Yeah, baby! I did it! I did it!
497
00:20:32,905 --> 00:20:34,204
[LAUGHS]
498
00:20:34,206 --> 00:20:35,553
Aw, man.
499
00:20:35,831 --> 00:20:38,728
- Hey, so, friends?
- Best friends.
500
00:20:38,753 --> 00:20:40,043
That's a little much.
501
00:20:40,045 --> 00:20:41,811
Come on, just razzing you, man,
502
00:20:41,813 --> 00:20:44,047
- like friends do.
- All right.
503
00:20:44,049 --> 00:20:46,383
- Go ice those balls.
- I will.
504
00:20:46,385 --> 00:20:49,386
I'm not far behind. Oof.
505
00:20:49,388 --> 00:20:51,254
- [LAUGHS]
- Hey.
506
00:20:51,256 --> 00:20:53,490
I see you found your
school spirit, Jack.
507
00:20:53,492 --> 00:20:55,679
No, I've just grown to hate
these Prairie hicks so much
508
00:20:55,704 --> 00:20:57,361
that I wanted to see
them lose, you know?
509
00:20:57,363 --> 00:20:58,781
And feel deep humiliation.
510
00:20:58,806 --> 00:21:01,086
That is exactly what school spirit is.
511
00:21:01,111 --> 00:21:02,366
Here.
512
00:21:02,368 --> 00:21:05,102
- [INDISTINCT]
- Geez.
513
00:21:05,104 --> 00:21:07,904
Oh, come on, don't make
a big deal out of this.
514
00:21:07,906 --> 00:21:12,842
♪ In the sunshine of your smile ♪
515
00:21:12,844 --> 00:21:14,577
Why not, huh?
516
00:21:14,579 --> 00:21:17,914
♪ That keeps you warm ♪
517
00:21:17,916 --> 00:21:20,182
♪ I'll keep you warm ♪
518
00:21:20,184 --> 00:21:22,204
♪ I'll keep you warm ♪