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WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
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- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.MY-SUBS.com --
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Here, let me.
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No, sit.
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For goodness' sakes, I'm fine.
It was only a panic attack.
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If I had a dollar for every time
you've said that over the past week,
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I still wouldn't be able to afford
anything in this goddamn city.
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The doctor said you
need to rest, so sit.
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Are you using the good glasses?
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- They're in the cupboard.
- On the left. I know.
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Although why you're treating
us like foreign ambassadors
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visiting from overseas
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and not family, I'm not sure.
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Well, it's not every day we get
together like this, is it?
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Not a single time in the
last 25 years, actually.
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I'd say that calls for the good china.
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Even if a few of the attendees
are flat-out lunatics.
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To be fair, they had some
reason to suspect Sam.
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I mean, three old ladies die?
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And they've all left him
stuff in their wills?
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Did you hear what they left him?
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Oh, yeah.
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Used suits...
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A three-legged cat named Trip?
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And some sort of gummy erasers you
can't find in the stores anymore.
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That third woman sounds
like a real bitch.
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I'm kind of surprised you
agreed to come today.
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Yeah, well...
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since I stalked Anna and accused
her friend of being a villain,
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it did seem like the least I could do.
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You know, Sam came by the other
day when I was on my, uh...
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"make sure Anna's okay" shift.
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He was pretty understanding about
the whole misunderstanding.
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Well, you know what the worst thing is?
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I can't even blame it all on Mary Ann.
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Yeah, I know that feeling.
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So, how's this, uh... you know,
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the, uh, girl who's
doing the documentary?
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Fine.
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Fine? That's all you're gonna give me?
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Don't be so pushy. I mean, it's like...
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I... I mean, we're not a thing.
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Look, I just want you to
know you can bring home
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whoever you want when you move back in.
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What?
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We never talked about that.
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No, I know, but I just...
I kind of assumed,
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- when Anna sells...
- Dad, I'm not gonna move back in with you.
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Oh.
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Sorry.
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No, it's not a big deal. I get it.
You need to live your own life.
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You need to leave the nest, you
gotta be an independent woman,
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- like Beyoncé.
- Oh, God.
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- Overdid it, didn't I?
- Yes, by a lot.
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Yeah.
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Painful.
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Wealthy people support charities, right?
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- What?
- You're supposed to answer.
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- It's interactive.
- Oh, okay. Fine.
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Yes.
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They pay taxes.
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They donate art, they
keep banks solvent.
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Word. Solvent.
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But how does the world repay them?
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- Am I supposed to answer this?
- No.
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They're demonized.
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Misunderstood. I mean,
they're totally vilified.
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An easy target for the angry masses.
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I'm sorry, I'm really trying to follow,
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but I have zero idea
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- where you're going with this.
- No... In the spirit
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of un-othering the other,
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we propose drawing back
the velvet curtain
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and streaming the life of an
actual one-percenter on Instagram,
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revealing the true tale of
privilege, unvarnished and real.
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I mean, the joys, the heartaches,
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the pressures, the stressors...
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The sheer responsibility of vast wealth.
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Did someone on the Arts Council bet
you could get me to believe this?
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DeDe. DeDe, DeDe.
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It's time to unstick your sticky.
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Yes. I believe I heard you say
that at your performance piece.
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We hashtagged it. It's trending.
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So you think what the world needs
is more coverage of white people?
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See, we really need you to
trust our artistic vision.
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We're your Michelangelo.
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And you're our Pope Julius II.
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You're not gonna fuck with
our Sistine Chapel, are you?
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Michelangelo didn't even wanna
paint the Sistine Chapel,
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so the analogy doesn't really hold.
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Anyway, where do you
envision this happening?
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It's a site-specific piece.
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We'll live in your guesthouse
and document your life.
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Here?
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- I don't know, guys...
- Imagine your big, empty house
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filled with vibrant,
socially-conscious...
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- Attractive.
- Attrac...
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Attractive young people like us,
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making a positive impact on the world.
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I mean, can't you see it?
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A Twinvasion of a wealthy, woke...
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White woman's world.
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"Walk a mile in my Louboutins."
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Boom.
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Okay. Okay, against my better judgment.
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As long as it's clear
I'm in on the joke.
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Yes.
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We're twincomparable.
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And also not homeless losers.
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Ooh! We should invite some
influencers over soon.
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- Twinfluencers.
- Oh!
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Wa-wa-wa-wa!
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Oh, shit. We forgot to
give her the present.
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Hey, old lady, we're here.
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I prefer "old queen" if
we're being technical.
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Hey. Hey.
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Where's Anna?
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Uh... She's changing her outfit.
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She feeling okay?
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Apparently, not that she'll let me ask.
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You wanna start filling water glasses?
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- If I have to, I...
- Hi.
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Hi.
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I'm sorry I'm late.
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I had to stop for beer.
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That's the best reason
I've heard for being late.
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- Hey.
- Hi, how can I help?
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Uh, napkin duty?
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You got it, babycakes.
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This is a token of our appreciation.
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Thank you.
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I'm touched.
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You're an ally of white people?
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I can see how that might be confusing.
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- Can I have the tahini?
- No.
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- These are delicious.
- Brian?
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Best anyone's ever made.
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Thank you.
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- Mm.
- More sherry, please.
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- Oh... Are you sure...
- I think one glass is probably enough.
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Now, that's enough.
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The babysitting shifts have to stop.
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- That's... not what we're doing.
- We're not.
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I'm old, but I'm not stupid.
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I love you all, even if two of
you make terrible detectives.
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It's a great IPA.
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Oh, I... I asked the guy at
the store for a good one.
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Very thoughtful of you.
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Ow!
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What happened?
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Nothing.
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You off carbs?
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No, no, I... I like to save
the croutons till last.
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I guess there is something to genetics.
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So, how is house hunting going?
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Let's see. Um...
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I saw a room being
rented out by a family
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with seven home-schooled kids...
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- Oh!
- A studio with a haunted closet
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and a one-bedroom where the only place
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I could stand up without hitting my head
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was the kitchen.
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Oh, and there are
already 15 applications
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ahead of me on that one, so...
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Why don't you move into my
old room at Dad's, right?
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- Oh.
- I thought you were moving back in.
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Miss Independent's gonna
live with friends.
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- But don't worry, it's clean.
- Straight-guy clean.
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Eww.
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I love you, but we can't work
together and live together.
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You should think about renting
it out. You could make a mint.
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I might need to take it soon, before
Mateo murders me in my sleep.
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Anna, you all right?
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I'm so sorry that...
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my decision to sell has...
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all of you...
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well...
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looking for places to live.
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Hey, none of that.
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We're adults. We can take care
of ourselves, for the most part.
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Yeah, we're... we're gonna be fine.
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I'm... I'm sorry I... I brought it up.
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Well, it's the elephant
in the room, isn't it?
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I suppose we should just
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all enjoy...
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being together.
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I mean, we brought out the
good china, after all.
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To you...
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my chosen family.
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- To us.
- To us.
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Do you really think we
should stop the shifts?
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00:09:16,010 --> 00:09:17,430
If you value your life.
192
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,760
I had forgotten how fierce she can be.
193
00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,600
You must never forget the
power of the Madrigal.
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This is nice.
195
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Yeah.
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00:09:38,700 --> 00:09:40,870
There's nothing like
thinking Anna's dying
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00:09:41,780 --> 00:09:43,490
to put things into perspective, right?
198
00:09:43,580 --> 00:09:46,580
Yeah. Really makes you stop and
think about all the stupid shit
199
00:09:46,660 --> 00:09:48,950
you waste your time on and what
we could be doing instead.
200
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:50,000
Carpe diem.
201
00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:52,630
Or the less clichéd version of it.
202
00:09:54,670 --> 00:09:55,670
Exactly.
203
00:09:58,380 --> 00:10:00,550
- Kinda.
- No, yeah.
204
00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:03,760
Do you think they're fucking?
205
00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:05,219
Gross.
206
00:10:05,220 --> 00:10:07,350
Shh! I'm connecting with the universe.
207
00:10:09,020 --> 00:10:10,120
Oh! For God's sakes,
208
00:10:10,150 --> 00:10:11,770
- it's not Uno. God.
- Wh...
209
00:10:11,860 --> 00:10:12,860
- What?
- Give me that.
210
00:10:13,230 --> 00:10:14,980
Okay. Okay, here we go.
211
00:10:15,070 --> 00:10:19,030
All right. So, think of a
question that you want answered.
212
00:10:19,110 --> 00:10:20,280
Um, here, take these.
213
00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:22,490
Shuffle for as long as you want, um...
214
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:25,080
and then cut the deck
once with your left hand.
215
00:10:34,630 --> 00:10:36,630
Wassup, millennial?
216
00:10:36,710 --> 00:10:39,010
Do not ever call me that again.
217
00:10:39,090 --> 00:10:40,090
Is it a girl?
218
00:10:41,930 --> 00:10:44,260
Well, what happened? She
use too many emojis?
219
00:10:44,350 --> 00:10:46,680
Oh, no, she didn't use
the winky face, did she?
220
00:10:47,390 --> 00:10:49,430
Oh, my God. Tell me you
didn't break the golden rule
221
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:51,770
and send more than three
unanswered texts, did you?
222
00:10:53,310 --> 00:10:54,570
I know, she canceled on you.
223
00:10:54,650 --> 00:10:55,650
Fuck you.
224
00:10:58,280 --> 00:10:59,650
Yeah, she did. Twice.
225
00:11:00,110 --> 00:11:01,110
Oh, shit.
226
00:11:01,610 --> 00:11:04,370
Perhaps there's a good explanation.
227
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,920
Drying just seems like such a
complete fuckin' waste of time.
228
00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:14,880
Wouldn't these plates dry themselves
if you put them back wet?
229
00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:18,550
I swear, we had the exact same
conversation when we were married.
230
00:11:23,470 --> 00:11:25,640
Water spots. That's
what you always said.
231
00:11:25,890 --> 00:11:27,140
Yeah, well, it's true.
232
00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:32,350
Mary Ann, are you...
233
00:11:33,310 --> 00:11:34,730
Are you wiping down the sink?
234
00:11:35,470 --> 00:11:36,519
There's water.
235
00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:37,530
It's a sink.
236
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,610
Carpe diem. Hm?
237
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:43,530
That doesn't... That
really makes no sense.
238
00:11:43,610 --> 00:11:46,200
- Yes, it does. It does.
- No, you can't seize the day by...
239
00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:48,370
- Wiping a sink is seizing the day?
- Absolutely.
240
00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:52,540
What's goin' on in there?
241
00:11:52,620 --> 00:11:53,620
Nothing!
242
00:11:57,130 --> 00:11:58,380
I really think they're...
243
00:11:59,710 --> 00:12:00,920
Michael, stop it.
244
00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:03,240
Okay. Do you wanna tell us
the question you asked?
245
00:12:03,270 --> 00:12:04,680
I mean, you don't have to.
246
00:12:07,470 --> 00:12:11,020
I'm wondering what I need to
know about this time in my life.
247
00:12:16,620 --> 00:12:17,680
Oh.
248
00:12:17,690 --> 00:12:19,530
Perfect. I love this card.
249
00:12:20,780 --> 00:12:22,900
Of course you do. It has
three beautiful girls
250
00:12:22,923 --> 00:12:24,200
drinking from goblets on it.
251
00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:25,530
Go on, Shawna.
252
00:12:25,610 --> 00:12:26,780
Stop!
253
00:12:27,530 --> 00:12:29,490
What does... What does it mean?
254
00:12:29,870 --> 00:12:31,880
Well, it's, uh... well,
the Three of Cups,
255
00:12:31,900 --> 00:12:34,080
it... it represents friendship,
256
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:36,170
uh, celebration, community.
257
00:12:36,540 --> 00:12:38,620
Hm... It's about, like, looking around
258
00:12:38,650 --> 00:12:41,920
and appreciating the people who
create your community, you know.
259
00:12:42,340 --> 00:12:45,090
- Uh-huh.
- And, you know, um...
260
00:12:45,180 --> 00:12:49,260
the spontaneous celebrations
that arise from those people.
261
00:12:49,510 --> 00:12:50,600
Hmm.
262
00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,690
So, basically, I guess it's like
Barbary Lane in a card, really.
263
00:12:55,810 --> 00:12:57,560
- Are you a witch?
- Yes.
264
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:01,400
That's a wonderful sentiment
for me to think about.
265
00:13:02,900 --> 00:13:03,900
Thank you.
266
00:13:04,610 --> 00:13:06,070
So, what's goin' on in here?
267
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:08,620
- They're a coven.
- Oh, I've known that for years.
268
00:13:09,620 --> 00:13:11,290
Uh, I guess we should get goin'.
269
00:13:13,950 --> 00:13:16,040
Such a wonderful afternoon.
270
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:18,790
- Yeah.
- Well, I love you, old lady.
271
00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:20,210
And we'll see you later.
272
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:23,380
In, like, a... In a totally spontaneous,
273
00:13:23,460 --> 00:13:28,180
completely non-babysitting
context sort of way.
274
00:13:34,230 --> 00:13:35,640
All right, all right.
275
00:13:37,560 --> 00:13:38,560
Mm!
276
00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:49,700
- See ya.
- Yeah.
277
00:13:57,290 --> 00:13:59,420
- So, you off to DeDe's?
- Mm.
278
00:13:59,500 --> 00:14:01,210
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
279
00:14:19,980 --> 00:14:21,700
Hey, since we're already day drinking,
280
00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:23,730
do you wanna come over for that wine?
281
00:14:24,190 --> 00:14:25,480
Or coffee.
282
00:14:27,820 --> 00:14:29,600
I haven't been able to
drink coffee past noon
283
00:14:29,630 --> 00:14:31,360
since I turned 40, but...
284
00:14:32,450 --> 00:14:33,740
wine sounds nice.
285
00:14:38,540 --> 00:14:41,750
♪ Told me so many other times ♪
286
00:14:42,710 --> 00:14:44,760
Listen, you're a mediocre performer
287
00:14:44,780 --> 00:14:46,180
in a ratchet burlesque club
288
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:47,940
in a city that's gonna fall into the sea
289
00:14:47,970 --> 00:14:51,050
on a planet that's hurtling
headlong into Armageddon.
290
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,180
- Priorities, bitch.
- That's not an answer.
291
00:14:53,260 --> 00:14:56,270
All I wanna know is why they decided
to call it "Touch O' Butch."
292
00:14:56,350 --> 00:14:59,600
'Cause "Touch O' Masculine of Center"
wouldn't fit on the marquee?
293
00:14:59,980 --> 00:15:01,190
Hey, I wo... I wouldn't...
294
00:15:01,270 --> 00:15:03,480
Yeah, I got permission from Ida.
295
00:15:05,780 --> 00:15:06,790
- Told ya.
- Aaah!
296
00:15:06,820 --> 00:15:08,190
- Fuck!
- Jesus Christ.
297
00:15:08,280 --> 00:15:10,360
- What'd I say? What'd I say?
- Jesus Christ.
298
00:15:10,450 --> 00:15:12,490
- Aaargh!
- I knew it. I knew it!
299
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:14,200
Fuck.
300
00:15:14,490 --> 00:15:15,910
Wow.
301
00:15:15,990 --> 00:15:18,620
Who's been makin' things
all sexy in here?
302
00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:21,460
Here, let me just get...
303
00:15:25,030 --> 00:15:26,070
- Oh.
- Oh!
304
00:15:26,090 --> 00:15:27,880
Thank you. Amazing.
305
00:15:27,960 --> 00:15:28,960
Thank you.
306
00:15:29,670 --> 00:15:30,930
- Hey.
- Hey.
307
00:15:32,130 --> 00:15:33,510
Uh, what are you doing here?
308
00:15:33,590 --> 00:15:35,300
I'm just shooting some interviews.
309
00:15:35,820 --> 00:15:36,880
Can I help?
310
00:15:36,890 --> 00:15:37,890
No, I'm good.
311
00:15:40,850 --> 00:15:43,520
Ah... Oh, my God, I had
this crazy brunch today.
312
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,020
Like, Mary Ann came, and...
313
00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:47,980
Uh, Shawna, sorry, I can't
really chat right now.
314
00:15:48,070 --> 00:15:50,030
I... I gotta focus on the work.
315
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:54,990
Yeah, yeah, sorry.
316
00:15:57,660 --> 00:15:59,950
Marlowe! Hey.
317
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,330
Carlin, oh, my God, I
love this new blazer.
318
00:16:02,410 --> 00:16:03,410
- Oh, thanks.
- Yeah.
319
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:06,590
Margot. My girl.
320
00:16:07,090 --> 00:16:08,090
"My girl"?
321
00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:10,050
Yeah. God, you look hot.
322
00:16:11,220 --> 00:16:12,590
Divorce adrenaline.
323
00:16:12,680 --> 00:16:14,680
Can't wallow around in
sweatpants now, you know?
324
00:16:17,300 --> 00:16:20,640
Seriously, what is going on with
you? You're being so weird.
325
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:22,850
What? Nothing, no. Mm-mm. Nope.
326
00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:26,730
All right, this is, uh...
This is my good side, so.
327
00:16:26,810 --> 00:16:27,810
Okay.
328
00:16:30,070 --> 00:16:32,570
So, um... why don't you start by...
329
00:16:32,650 --> 00:16:35,110
giving me the history of Body Politic?
330
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:36,740
The physical space, I mean.
331
00:16:36,820 --> 00:16:39,330
Well, shit, it's always
been some kind of gay bar.
332
00:16:39,410 --> 00:16:41,950
It started out as a cross-dressing club
333
00:16:42,040 --> 00:16:44,540
with waiters-slash-hookers in the '40s.
334
00:16:44,620 --> 00:16:46,290
And then it was a Latin leather club.
335
00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:48,420
Nope, it was a black leather club.
336
00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,460
I heard in the '60s it was
run by some trans lady.
337
00:16:51,550 --> 00:16:54,220
Someone told me it was a lesbian
disco club in the '70s.
338
00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:55,800
Uh, hey, guys, one at a time.
339
00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:58,890
Hey, Ida, someone broke a
glass in the ice machine.
340
00:16:59,220 --> 00:17:00,560
God... damn it!
341
00:17:01,060 --> 00:17:02,600
Here. I... I can't.
342
00:17:03,020 --> 00:17:04,580
This is the last time
I hire from Grindr.
343
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:06,450
- Fuckin' seriously?
- If I find out who it is,
344
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,940
I'mma break my foot off
up their ass machine.
345
00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:10,570
No.
346
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,280
I'll do it.
347
00:17:23,620 --> 00:17:24,620
Hey.
348
00:17:32,250 --> 00:17:33,420
Wow!
349
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:37,380
That's the side table we... we
found at Treasure Island Flea!
350
00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:39,300
Yeah. I still love it.
351
00:17:39,390 --> 00:17:41,680
Well, you did not love lugging
it back on the ferry.
352
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:42,890
- No. No.
- No.
353
00:17:42,970 --> 00:17:45,560
- What a pain in the ass that was.
- Yeah.
354
00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:48,600
Uh... Chardonnay.
355
00:17:50,190 --> 00:17:51,190
Perfect.
356
00:17:56,570 --> 00:17:57,650
Oh!
357
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:00,740
Oh, my God.
358
00:18:01,950 --> 00:18:03,330
Is that our old stereo?
359
00:18:03,870 --> 00:18:06,540
Yeah. Pick something out, if you want.
360
00:18:20,220 --> 00:18:21,220
Here.
361
00:18:22,470 --> 00:18:23,640
Oh. Oops.
362
00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:24,760
Jesus, I'm sorry.
363
00:18:24,780 --> 00:18:26,810
It's all right. It's all right.
364
00:18:27,060 --> 00:18:28,230
Yeah, hang on a second.
365
00:18:28,810 --> 00:18:29,810
Hang on.
366
00:18:31,770 --> 00:18:32,770
Here.
367
00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:35,690
How long have you lived here?
368
00:18:35,780 --> 00:18:39,820
Uh, we moved here when
Shawna was in... sixth grade.
369
00:18:41,530 --> 00:18:42,950
She was really into the elevator.
370
00:18:43,030 --> 00:18:46,040
Well... until she discovered boys...
371
00:18:46,350 --> 00:18:47,420
and girls.
372
00:18:47,440 --> 00:18:48,580
Hm! Mm.
373
00:18:51,750 --> 00:18:52,750
And before this?
374
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:54,090
Oh, lots of places.
375
00:18:55,420 --> 00:18:56,960
We moved every time the rent went up,
376
00:18:57,050 --> 00:18:59,260
but we always stayed
close to Barbary Lane.
377
00:19:02,390 --> 00:19:04,140
Was it always just the two of you?
378
00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:10,440
I didn't wanna be one
of those divorced dads
379
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:12,801
who's constantly dragging people
through their kid's life.
380
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:15,120
I mean, not that there weren't women...
381
00:19:15,150 --> 00:19:16,580
Oh, of course.
382
00:19:21,780 --> 00:19:23,180
I'm gonna call DeDe to let her know
383
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:24,400
- I won't be back yet.
- Yeah.
384
00:19:24,450 --> 00:19:26,450
She gets so worried if she
doesn't know where I am.
385
00:19:37,710 --> 00:19:39,010
- Don't forget to tag us.
- Oh!
386
00:19:39,090 --> 00:19:40,420
- Okay!
- Hashtag #bestwhiteally.
387
00:19:40,510 --> 00:19:45,140
Oh! I'm so glad your friends decided
to come over. Isn't this fun?
388
00:19:45,220 --> 00:19:46,430
Are... Are you having fun?
389
00:19:46,510 --> 00:19:48,470
Well, actually, they're
social influencers.
390
00:19:48,970 --> 00:19:51,480
Is that what kids say
instead of "popular" now?
391
00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:53,100
Uh... Kind of?
392
00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:55,980
I'll tell Mateo to bring
out more bruschetta.
393
00:19:56,060 --> 00:19:57,480
Everyone must be getting hungry.
394
00:19:57,850 --> 00:19:58,900
Mateo!
395
00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:01,900
Mateo... Ah, shit.
396
00:20:02,110 --> 00:20:03,990
I really need to get him a buzzer.
397
00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:05,950
She's, like, weirdly
okay with all of this.
398
00:20:06,030 --> 00:20:08,080
Yeah, seems like she's
really in her element.
399
00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:09,700
She looks so happy, doesn't she?
400
00:20:09,790 --> 00:20:11,790
You know, I think maybe she was lonely.
401
00:20:11,870 --> 00:20:12,870
Aww.
402
00:20:13,370 --> 00:20:14,630
Everyone should have a twin.
403
00:20:17,380 --> 00:20:19,000
I miss Jonathan sometimes.
404
00:20:19,550 --> 00:20:21,920
Yeah. I miss Jennifer.
405
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:35,850
Hey! Hey...
406
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:41,900
Anna Madrigal!
407
00:20:41,990 --> 00:20:44,950
Where in God's name did you
ever wear something like this?
408
00:20:46,410 --> 00:20:50,200
The Anna I know wafted around
Barbary Lane in caftans,
409
00:20:50,220 --> 00:20:52,100
smoking joints.
410
00:20:53,580 --> 00:20:54,960
"I'm Mrs. Madrigal.
411
00:20:56,210 --> 00:20:58,000
As in medieval.
412
00:20:59,090 --> 00:21:00,840
Now be a dear, dear,
413
00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:04,550
and pass me the sensimilla."
414
00:21:09,550 --> 00:21:11,520
I hate to break it to you,
415
00:21:12,430 --> 00:21:15,190
but I wore it best.
416
00:21:17,060 --> 00:21:18,060
Arguable.
417
00:21:21,690 --> 00:21:23,820
I haven't heard Ben's name lately.
418
00:21:25,530 --> 00:21:27,070
Everything all right?
419
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:31,080
We're okay.
420
00:21:31,580 --> 00:21:33,330
You don't sound convincing.
421
00:21:38,380 --> 00:21:40,000
I guess I...
422
00:21:41,590 --> 00:21:43,710
don't know if we want the same things.
423
00:21:44,840 --> 00:21:48,090
Because he said he wasn't ready
to move in with you yet?
424
00:21:48,470 --> 00:21:49,890
"Yet." Exactly.
425
00:21:50,350 --> 00:21:52,010
"Yet" implies a future.
426
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:54,600
Does it not?
427
00:22:02,860 --> 00:22:06,150
It's like when you're at a
restaurant and the waiter comes up
428
00:22:06,240 --> 00:22:09,820
and he says, "I'm so sorry, but
we're out of the chicken."
429
00:22:11,870 --> 00:22:13,760
You probably wouldn't even have
ordered the chicken anyway
430
00:22:13,780 --> 00:22:15,860
because that's boring.
431
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,920
But the absence of it,
432
00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:23,710
someone else telling you
that you can't have it,
433
00:22:24,420 --> 00:22:27,510
suddenly it makes you want the
chicken more than anything.
434
00:22:28,550 --> 00:22:29,550
Or...
435
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,760
maybe it makes you realize...
436
00:22:34,060 --> 00:22:36,180
how much you love chicken.
437
00:22:41,650 --> 00:22:43,900
I thought I'd out-metaphored
you for once.
438
00:22:43,980 --> 00:22:44,980
Never!
439
00:22:47,900 --> 00:22:50,700
And then we moved to
this tiny, shithole town
440
00:22:50,780 --> 00:22:52,990
in one of those states known
for growin' two things,
441
00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:55,120
peanuts and evangelists.
442
00:22:55,790 --> 00:22:59,580
By the time I was 16, I knew I
was feelin' all kinds of things
443
00:22:59,660 --> 00:23:01,540
the Bible said I shouldn't be feelin'.
444
00:23:02,420 --> 00:23:05,130
I used to go on movie
dates with boys, and...
445
00:23:05,210 --> 00:23:07,130
we'd both be hot for the leadin' lady.
446
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:12,010
I bet I saw Flashdance, like, ten times.
447
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:16,430
Jennifer Beals, man. Whew!
448
00:23:17,060 --> 00:23:20,480
Talk about built like a brick shithouse.
449
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:21,940
Oh, my God.
450
00:23:23,440 --> 00:23:28,030
You know, I was pretty sure I was
the only lesbo in the whole world.
451
00:23:32,360 --> 00:23:33,740
And every Sunday, when...
452
00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:38,580
my mom would make me put on a dress
and curl my hair for church,
453
00:23:38,660 --> 00:23:41,800
it felt like I was being
forced in a girl costume
454
00:23:41,820 --> 00:23:44,660
for Halloween or somethin'.
455
00:23:46,340 --> 00:23:50,090
I was so jealous of my brothers
who got to wear a suit
456
00:23:50,170 --> 00:23:52,930
and then go feel up their
girlfriends in the barn.
457
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:56,100
Anyway...
458
00:23:56,180 --> 00:23:59,470
Thank God my dyke PE
teacher took pity on me
459
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:02,270
and told me about the one gay
bar a couple towns over.
460
00:24:03,770 --> 00:24:04,860
And that place...
461
00:24:05,770 --> 00:24:07,900
That place saved my fuckin' life.
462
00:24:11,150 --> 00:24:14,160
You know, the gays have
always made spaces
463
00:24:14,180 --> 00:24:16,410
for the freaks and weirdos.
464
00:24:17,660 --> 00:24:19,580
Places like that little gay bar.
465
00:24:21,370 --> 00:24:22,750
Places like Body Politic.
466
00:24:26,630 --> 00:24:28,040
Oh, wait. Um...
467
00:24:28,670 --> 00:24:30,880
Yeah, that was great. Uh...
468
00:24:32,010 --> 00:24:35,430
Just "freaks" and "weirdos"
are kind of judgy words.
469
00:24:35,510 --> 00:24:39,970
So, um... let's do another
take, and this time say...
470
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:42,850
"marginalized outsiders" instead.
471
00:24:42,930 --> 00:24:44,020
Okay. Um...
472
00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:48,190
How about I say, uh...
"Go fuck yourself"?
473
00:24:48,610 --> 00:24:53,200
Or should I say, "Go have tender
union with your own lady parts"?
474
00:25:00,580 --> 00:25:02,080
You got my fucking mic.
475
00:25:04,080 --> 00:25:06,920
Dude, what the fuck was that?
476
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,710
I've literally never heard you
laugh like that in your life.
477
00:25:12,210 --> 00:25:15,130
Well, Claire and I had this,
like, really amazing night.
478
00:25:15,220 --> 00:25:16,720
Like, really, really cool.
479
00:25:17,260 --> 00:25:18,260
And I...
480
00:25:18,800 --> 00:25:21,220
She's just, like, shutting
me out. I don't get it.
481
00:25:22,270 --> 00:25:23,270
Dude...
482
00:25:23,740 --> 00:25:24,760
What?
483
00:25:24,770 --> 00:25:28,360
That is like exactly what you
do to every person you fuck.
484
00:25:30,190 --> 00:25:31,780
Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm saying,
485
00:25:31,860 --> 00:25:33,670
That's what I'm talking about.
486
00:25:33,690 --> 00:25:35,150
- I... that's my thing.
- Shh...
487
00:25:39,570 --> 00:25:40,830
- Hey.
- Hey.
488
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:42,240
How'd it go?
489
00:25:42,950 --> 00:25:46,330
Uh... Other than the fact that
none of them understand how...
490
00:25:46,830 --> 00:25:49,080
intensely important this
all is, it was great.
491
00:25:50,470 --> 00:25:51,500
Do you want a drink?
492
00:25:51,590 --> 00:25:54,460
No, I gotta go download
this footage, but, um...
493
00:25:55,470 --> 00:25:56,760
Uh, I'll text you.
494
00:26:03,970 --> 00:26:06,350
I mean, wasn't that weird? I
think she's being really weird.
495
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:08,480
I was wrong.
496
00:26:08,980 --> 00:26:10,690
You're not dating yourself.
497
00:26:11,150 --> 00:26:12,320
You're dating your mom.
498
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:14,440
What?
499
00:26:14,820 --> 00:26:16,110
Career first?
500
00:26:17,110 --> 00:26:18,320
Oh, fuck.
501
00:26:18,410 --> 00:26:20,490
Speaking of older women...
502
00:26:22,080 --> 00:26:25,120
DeDe, would you talk about high
thread count sheets again?
503
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,120
Look, self care is not an extravagance.
504
00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:29,500
It's a discipline.
505
00:26:29,580 --> 00:26:30,830
She's kinda hot.
506
00:26:33,630 --> 00:26:34,630
I kissed her.
507
00:26:35,460 --> 00:26:36,460
What?
508
00:26:37,260 --> 00:26:38,260
God.
509
00:26:39,090 --> 00:26:40,550
And I'm dating my mother!
510
00:26:43,260 --> 00:26:44,640
Unless it was Carolyn's idea
511
00:26:44,690 --> 00:26:47,310
to go out in the boat
and not her husband's.
512
00:26:47,770 --> 00:26:50,560
Come on, pay attention. I'm
trying to share a seminal part
513
00:26:50,650 --> 00:26:52,620
- of my life with you.
- Right, right. You're right.
514
00:26:52,650 --> 00:26:54,250
- We assume that there would be...
- Right.
515
00:26:54,270 --> 00:26:55,900
... at least one witness handy.
516
00:26:55,980 --> 00:26:57,030
Well, why?
517
00:26:57,110 --> 00:26:58,150
So she could stay...
518
00:26:58,240 --> 00:26:59,740
Wait, why's it called Murder, She Wrote?
519
00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:01,490
I thought she was a detective.
520
00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:04,490
She's a mystery novelist
who solves murders.
521
00:27:04,580 --> 00:27:07,500
- Because her husband...
- It ran for 12 seasons. Twelve.
522
00:27:08,250 --> 00:27:09,910
Angela Lansbury is an icon.
523
00:27:10,000 --> 00:27:11,920
Okay, you're gaysplaining to me again.
524
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:13,210
Well, someone has to.
525
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:16,800
Anyway, after owning Broadway in Mame,
526
00:27:17,590 --> 00:27:19,720
the reviews said she was incandescent.
527
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:21,840
Okay, that is, like, the gayest thing
528
00:27:21,860 --> 00:27:22,870
that's ever come out of your mouth.
529
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:23,890
- Wait, watch.
- What?
530
00:27:23,920 --> 00:27:26,010
She's about to figure out
how the uncle ends up dead
531
00:27:26,060 --> 00:27:28,730
- in a locked room with a python.
- So that when she did turn up...
532
00:27:28,810 --> 00:27:32,770
So, wherever this lady goes,
somebody gets killed?
533
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:35,380
- Mm-hmm.
- I don't care if it was unlikely.
534
00:27:35,390 --> 00:27:36,399
It happened.
535
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,650
- Why would anybody invite her anywhere?
- Shh!
536
00:27:38,740 --> 00:27:40,990
Now, her testimony and
mine will surely...
537
00:27:41,060 --> 00:27:42,600
- Hey.
- try and convict him
538
00:27:42,620 --> 00:27:43,640
of attempted murder.
539
00:27:43,660 --> 00:27:46,030
I know something that we
both will like watching.
540
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:47,620
But, I want...
541
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:50,830
... has got to be a
flaw in that somewhere.
542
00:27:51,210 --> 00:27:53,120
- So strong.
- Oh, yeah.
543
00:27:53,500 --> 00:27:55,500
- Young and strong.
- Oh!
544
00:27:55,590 --> 00:27:57,750
Welcome, Michael Tolliver,
545
00:27:58,050 --> 00:28:01,220
to the world of CGI porn.
546
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:05,350
Nope, nope, food and porn, nope. Aah.
547
00:28:05,430 --> 00:28:06,550
Hah!
548
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:07,640
I, um...
549
00:28:10,310 --> 00:28:11,980
How did you happen to find this?
550
00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:15,020
I kind of just fell down
a giant rabbit hole.
551
00:28:15,110 --> 00:28:16,860
Ooh, no!
552
00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:20,190
It's better than Murder, She Wrote.
553
00:28:21,490 --> 00:28:22,990
Please don't make me say it.
554
00:28:23,070 --> 00:28:24,910
Mm!
555
00:28:24,990 --> 00:28:25,990
Oh!
556
00:28:27,580 --> 00:28:29,700
We don't have to watch
the rest, I mean...
557
00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:32,660
I can just show you how it ends.
558
00:28:38,750 --> 00:28:40,210
Aaah!
559
00:28:42,420 --> 00:28:44,720
I assume this means you're staying over?
560
00:28:45,300 --> 00:28:48,260
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah. Yeah. Harder. Harder!
561
00:28:48,350 --> 00:28:49,680
You like that? You like it?
562
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:53,520
- Hey.
- Mm.
563
00:28:55,020 --> 00:28:56,150
Should we...
564
00:28:58,860 --> 00:29:00,940
take another shot at
goin' out one night?
565
00:29:02,860 --> 00:29:04,950
God, some of the things
I said that night...
566
00:29:05,030 --> 00:29:08,320
- Hey, hey. We both said things.
- Yeah, but let me... let me...
567
00:29:11,790 --> 00:29:12,790
Let me say this.
568
00:29:19,750 --> 00:29:20,920
I walked out on you.
569
00:29:23,590 --> 00:29:25,430
And I walked out on Shawna.
570
00:29:26,930 --> 00:29:28,220
And the truth is,
571
00:29:28,930 --> 00:29:30,640
I wasn't very good at being a mom.
572
00:29:33,770 --> 00:29:35,480
And I really thought...
573
00:29:38,650 --> 00:29:41,480
I really thought I was gonna go out
there and become the next Oprah,
574
00:29:41,570 --> 00:29:44,280
and I was gonna become famous, and
we all know how that worked out,
575
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:48,320
and the whole time you were here
alone, raising this amazing kid,
576
00:29:48,990 --> 00:29:51,200
and being the best father
anyone could ever have.
577
00:29:54,370 --> 00:29:56,250
Good parents don't lie to their kids.
578
00:29:59,290 --> 00:30:01,000
I should have told her the truth.
579
00:30:02,750 --> 00:30:04,130
But she was so...
580
00:30:06,010 --> 00:30:07,220
She was so little.
581
00:30:09,890 --> 00:30:11,930
And she'd just lost you, so I couldn't.
582
00:30:13,770 --> 00:30:14,930
And then it was too late.
583
00:30:15,020 --> 00:30:18,310
I knew how mad she'd be at me for
not telling her sooner, and...
584
00:30:18,390 --> 00:30:20,783
How was I supposed to
know she was gonna become
585
00:30:20,784 --> 00:30:22,480
this person that valued the truth?
586
00:30:22,570 --> 00:30:25,530
- You were just trying to protect her.
- Or protect myself.
587
00:30:27,700 --> 00:30:29,950
I figured she'd never
find out. How could she?
588
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:33,660
And then you came back.
589
00:30:35,700 --> 00:30:36,700
And here we are,
590
00:30:37,500 --> 00:30:39,120
in a great big mess that I made.
591
00:30:40,830 --> 00:30:42,040
No, you were right.
592
00:30:45,510 --> 00:30:46,990
You were right, and I am gonna do it.
593
00:30:47,050 --> 00:30:48,340
I am gonna tell her the truth.
594
00:30:48,420 --> 00:30:50,340
I don't know. No, no. I
think your way is right.
595
00:30:50,430 --> 00:30:53,600
- No, this is what you want.
- You... Yes, but I was being selfish.
596
00:30:56,310 --> 00:30:59,780
I just... I wanted her so
desperately to like me,
597
00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:01,520
and I thought if she knew, but...
598
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:02,980
The thing is, she's good.
599
00:31:03,520 --> 00:31:05,190
- Mm.
- She's really good.
600
00:31:06,570 --> 00:31:07,570
We're all good.
601
00:31:09,770 --> 00:31:11,120
I mean, is this really the time to go
602
00:31:11,140 --> 00:31:13,180
and just blow up her whole world?
603
00:31:13,580 --> 00:31:14,580
Maybe it won't blow up.
604
00:31:14,620 --> 00:31:17,580
Brian, she has a family
she loves, who loves her.
605
00:31:19,290 --> 00:31:20,790
Don't take that away from her.
606
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:24,000
God knows I learned that the hard way.
607
00:31:28,460 --> 00:31:29,460
I'm sorry.
608
00:31:31,430 --> 00:31:34,050
I am really sorry. I am
sorry for all of it.
609
00:31:40,060 --> 00:31:41,060
What? What?
610
00:31:41,770 --> 00:31:43,610
What? What? What? What?
611
00:31:43,690 --> 00:31:45,860
- Did I say the wrong thing? What?
- Sh, sh, sh, sh.
612
00:32:16,100 --> 00:32:17,140
I can't do this.
613
00:32:20,180 --> 00:32:23,520
It's not like I haven't thought
about this a million times.
614
00:32:25,360 --> 00:32:27,650
I didn't mean... I didn't mean
to come over here tonight.
615
00:32:27,730 --> 00:32:29,070
I didn't mean to get this drunk.
616
00:32:29,150 --> 00:32:31,240
- Carpe diem.
- Yeah, I want this.
617
00:32:31,690 --> 00:32:32,690
I do.
618
00:32:33,700 --> 00:32:34,950
Just not tonight.
619
00:32:57,720 --> 00:32:58,720
Mm.
620
00:33:06,520 --> 00:33:07,520
Oh.
621
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:10,360
Ben.
622
00:33:11,940 --> 00:33:12,940
Hey, baby.
623
00:33:14,700 --> 00:33:17,370
It's time to get up. It's already noon.
624
00:33:17,450 --> 00:33:19,120
Oh, my God.
625
00:33:19,450 --> 00:33:21,240
Ohhh!
626
00:33:21,950 --> 00:33:24,660
I was having the sexiest dream.
627
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:27,040
We were shipwrecked.
628
00:33:27,580 --> 00:33:29,460
It was you, me and...
629
00:33:30,460 --> 00:33:32,550
Jake Gyllenhaal.
630
00:33:34,220 --> 00:33:35,300
Mm.
631
00:33:37,090 --> 00:33:39,510
So theoretically, who
would your third be?
632
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,310
Ryan Reynolds.
633
00:33:41,390 --> 00:33:42,390
No.
634
00:33:42,970 --> 00:33:44,930
- Idris Elba.
- Oh!
635
00:33:52,110 --> 00:33:54,900
Maybe it doesn't have to be theoretical.
636
00:33:55,450 --> 00:33:57,070
What, you know Idris Elba?
637
00:33:58,030 --> 00:33:59,160
I'm serious.
638
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:04,240
Are you...
639
00:34:08,170 --> 00:34:09,220
sure?
640
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:14,920
I...
641
00:34:17,430 --> 00:34:19,090
want to...
642
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:23,850
experience new things with you.
643
00:34:26,140 --> 00:34:27,140
Okay?
644
00:34:33,980 --> 00:34:34,980
Okay.
645
00:34:37,530 --> 00:34:38,530
Mm.
646
00:34:42,370 --> 00:34:44,620
So we need to make a profile
for us as a couple.
647
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:45,699
Ooh!
648
00:34:45,700 --> 00:34:48,300
"Clean, intelligent, athletic couple
649
00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:50,880
seeks versatile guy for NSA fun."
650
00:34:52,170 --> 00:34:53,170
Boring.
651
00:34:56,500 --> 00:34:58,510
"Well-hung... "
652
00:34:58,590 --> 00:35:02,010
"... hot young techie and
sexy daddy seek... "
653
00:35:02,100 --> 00:35:03,300
I hate being a daddy.
654
00:35:03,390 --> 00:35:05,310
Why? You are a daddy. Own it.
655
00:35:05,860 --> 00:35:07,640
Well, at least put muscle daddy.
656
00:35:07,650 --> 00:35:08,660
Okay.
657
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:11,690
And if we're owning
shit, you are not 6'3".
658
00:35:11,770 --> 00:35:12,770
Uh, I am in heels.
659
00:35:14,150 --> 00:35:16,730
You checked "some" for body hair?
660
00:35:17,110 --> 00:35:18,320
Yeah, this is some.
661
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:22,160
Okay, how much constitutes some?
662
00:35:22,240 --> 00:35:24,660
Whatever it is, it definitely
does not include back hair.
663
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:26,450
You said you liked it.
664
00:35:26,540 --> 00:35:27,620
Aah... Okay.
665
00:35:27,700 --> 00:35:29,540
- All right. Come on. Post it.
- Mm-mm.
666
00:35:33,250 --> 00:35:34,250
Thank you.
667
00:35:44,180 --> 00:35:45,300
Aah!
668
00:35:56,520 --> 00:36:00,030
They want me to teach
them to curse in ASL.
669
00:36:01,150 --> 00:36:02,150
It's this,
670
00:36:02,570 --> 00:36:03,700
not this!
671
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:05,160
It's not a real sign!
672
00:36:08,580 --> 00:36:09,620
It's all yours.
673
00:36:25,140 --> 00:36:26,890
Number... one!
674
00:36:27,930 --> 00:36:29,140
Number two.
675
00:36:31,180 --> 00:36:32,560
Number one.
676
00:36:34,270 --> 00:36:35,670
Number...
677
00:36:36,730 --> 00:36:38,730
Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
678
00:36:41,030 --> 00:36:42,990
Okay. On the face.
679
00:38:31,390 --> 00:38:32,760
Hey, Claire Duncan.
680
00:38:33,970 --> 00:38:35,560
Uh... Come on in.
681
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:37,600
Yeah.
682
00:38:38,560 --> 00:38:41,810
I just wanted to bring your
dad's Barbary Lane photos back.
683
00:38:43,020 --> 00:38:44,070
Cool. Thanks.
684
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:46,280
Um...
685
00:38:47,780 --> 00:38:49,570
Can I get you anything? Tea or...
686
00:38:50,240 --> 00:38:52,280
I think I have hot chocolate?
687
00:38:53,830 --> 00:38:54,830
Um...
688
00:38:56,620 --> 00:38:57,620
Yeah.
689
00:38:58,250 --> 00:38:59,710
Uh, no. Um...
690
00:39:02,500 --> 00:39:04,710
So, Shawna, I've been
thinking, and, um...
691
00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:11,930
I can't accomplish everything I
need to and also keep seeing you.
692
00:39:13,350 --> 00:39:14,510
Um...
693
00:39:15,220 --> 00:39:17,770
And I... I don't wanna
keep dragging you along.
694
00:39:21,810 --> 00:39:23,730
I know it doesn't seem like it, but...
695
00:39:25,650 --> 00:39:26,980
I promise I'm doing you a favor.
696
00:39:27,070 --> 00:39:28,070
What?
697
00:39:31,860 --> 00:39:33,030
What about the other night?
698
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:34,120
It was great.
699
00:39:36,910 --> 00:39:38,120
You're a distraction.
700
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:43,080
It's just bad timing.
701
00:39:43,170 --> 00:39:44,170
It's the timing.
702
00:39:45,380 --> 00:39:46,380
It's not you.
703
00:39:49,470 --> 00:39:51,130
I don't do this, you know.
704
00:39:53,390 --> 00:39:54,390
Do what?
705
00:39:57,970 --> 00:39:58,970
Let people in.
706
00:40:03,270 --> 00:40:04,270
Yeah, I'm sorry.
707
00:40:09,940 --> 00:40:12,700
Maybe your mother was right.
Maybe you are broken.
708
00:40:20,330 --> 00:40:21,330
Yeah.
709
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:23,040
Maybe I am.
710
00:40:38,140 --> 00:40:41,140
Last text said he'd be here in an
hour. That was over an hour ago.
711
00:40:45,730 --> 00:40:48,440
What is NDQ?
712
00:40:49,530 --> 00:40:51,490
I don't know. Never seen that one.
713
00:40:53,070 --> 00:40:54,070
No dumb questions?
714
00:40:56,050 --> 00:40:57,100
Mm.
715
00:41:12,130 --> 00:41:13,130
I did it.
716
00:41:14,050 --> 00:41:15,800
I finally signed my divorce papers.
717
00:41:15,890 --> 00:41:17,890
Really? Are... Are you okay?
718
00:41:18,890 --> 00:41:20,970
I'm sad but good.
719
00:41:21,060 --> 00:41:23,020
You know, and also excited.
720
00:41:23,770 --> 00:41:24,770
I mean, it's...
721
00:41:25,350 --> 00:41:28,610
It's an end and a beginning all in one.
722
00:41:30,070 --> 00:41:31,280
Oh, my God, I'm interrupting.
723
00:41:31,650 --> 00:41:32,860
- Uh...
- I just...
724
00:41:32,940 --> 00:41:34,480
It's... It's just such a big deal,
725
00:41:34,500 --> 00:41:35,710
and I needed to tell my best friend.
726
00:41:35,740 --> 00:41:36,780
But I'll... I'll come back another time.
727
00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:38,780
No, no, no. Sit down.
728
00:41:38,870 --> 00:41:39,870
Tell me everything.
729
00:41:41,290 --> 00:41:43,490
Or maybe just, like, two things.
730
00:41:43,830 --> 00:41:45,420
You know, I... I might have a chance
731
00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:47,000
to do it better this time, you know?
732
00:41:47,080 --> 00:41:50,000
I... I just feel maybe,
this little family,
733
00:41:50,090 --> 00:41:53,710
Brian, Shawna, and me, I mean,
maybe they're my third act.
734
00:41:56,260 --> 00:41:59,760
All righty, that sounds good.
Sounds like it's settled.
735
00:42:02,310 --> 00:42:04,850
Mary Ann, it's always such
a pleasure to see you.
736
00:42:04,930 --> 00:42:08,520
Right. I mean, you don't have
to decide anything right now.
737
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:10,190
You know, maybe it's... it's too soon.
738
00:42:10,270 --> 00:42:12,870
I mean, truthfully, Robert and I,
we've been done for a long time.
739
00:42:12,900 --> 00:42:15,190
We're just finally burying the body.
740
00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:16,530
And what if I hurt Brian again?
741
00:42:16,610 --> 00:42:18,740
That is the last thing in
the world I'd want to do.
742
00:42:18,820 --> 00:42:22,030
Maybe you and Brian have been
brought back together for a reason.
743
00:42:22,910 --> 00:42:25,040
Can't argue with the fact
that Brian knows you
744
00:42:25,060 --> 00:42:26,860
in a way no one else does.
745
00:42:32,590 --> 00:42:33,800
You're right.
746
00:42:34,460 --> 00:42:35,590
You're right.
747
00:42:38,260 --> 00:42:40,430
Oh. Thank you.
748
00:42:41,140 --> 00:42:42,140
Thank you.
749
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:46,600
That's very helpful. I feel better.
750
00:42:48,690 --> 00:42:50,060
Also, I really need to pee.
751
00:42:56,190 --> 00:42:58,490
We have got to get her out of here.
752
00:42:58,570 --> 00:43:00,860
Relax. The guy probably flaked.
753
00:43:00,950 --> 00:43:02,700
They do this all the time.
754
00:43:06,700 --> 00:43:07,700
What do we do now?
755
00:43:08,790 --> 00:43:10,510
Maybe we can just ignore him?
756
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:12,130
Shit, shit.
757
00:43:12,220 --> 00:43:13,230
Hello?
758
00:43:13,250 --> 00:43:15,420
Is someone at the door?
759
00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:16,920
Oh, shit.
760
00:43:17,130 --> 00:43:19,300
God damn it. God damn it.
761
00:43:21,260 --> 00:43:23,100
Oh, the... the ferry was late.
762
00:43:23,180 --> 00:43:26,640
And then the first Uber driver
wouldn't let me bring Lana Del Rey.
763
00:43:26,720 --> 00:43:29,440
Mm. She's hypoallergenic,
for God's sake.
764
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:32,980
Anyway, it was a
nightmare, but I'm here.
765
00:43:34,020 --> 00:43:35,480
And I am ready to play.
766
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:41,410
Uh...
767
00:43:41,490 --> 00:43:43,950
I clearly said in my profile,
768
00:43:44,870 --> 00:43:46,160
no drag queens!
769
00:43:47,350 --> 00:43:48,400
NDQ!
770
00:43:48,410 --> 00:43:49,620
Mm-hmm.
771
00:43:50,250 --> 00:43:53,830
Well, I thought if you were
going into work today, dear...
772
00:43:55,250 --> 00:43:57,630
you wouldn't mind being my escort.
773
00:44:02,130 --> 00:44:03,300
Oh!
774
00:44:04,350 --> 00:44:05,350
Wonderful.
775
00:44:05,930 --> 00:44:07,180
I... I'll see you then.
776
00:44:27,280 --> 00:44:28,620
Oh, that's a good one.
777
00:44:29,700 --> 00:44:30,950
Mateo, look.
778
00:44:31,580 --> 00:44:34,210
BuzzFeed wrote an article about me.
779
00:44:35,330 --> 00:44:38,840
"This is the rich lady you
didn't know you needed."
780
00:44:41,050 --> 00:44:43,470
And Kristen Stewart said
781
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:48,350
she wants to learn sign
language because of you.
782
00:44:56,770 --> 00:44:57,770
Out!
783
00:44:58,020 --> 00:44:59,020
Uh-oh.
784
00:45:00,030 --> 00:45:02,570
The Oriental rug is ruined!
785
00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:04,740
- Excuse...
- I think you mean...
786
00:45:05,990 --> 00:45:06,990
"Asian."
787
00:45:08,620 --> 00:45:09,830
What did he say?
788
00:45:10,990 --> 00:45:12,540
"Asian" rug.
789
00:45:13,660 --> 00:45:17,000
"Oriental" is okay for rugs,
790
00:45:17,500 --> 00:45:18,500
not people.
791
00:45:18,630 --> 00:45:19,660
Uh... Wh...
792
00:45:19,670 --> 00:45:22,340
I'm deaf. You can't out-PC me!
793
00:45:24,720 --> 00:45:26,220
Calm down.
794
00:45:26,510 --> 00:45:27,800
It's all in good fun.
795
00:45:28,890 --> 00:45:30,060
Them...
796
00:45:31,310 --> 00:45:32,390
... or me.
797
00:45:32,640 --> 00:45:34,940
Don't make me choose.
798
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:45,950
I think this site is
specifically shut down.
799
00:45:48,240 --> 00:45:50,120
But it's your house.
800
00:45:50,410 --> 00:45:52,910
Keeping Mateo happy
801
00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:56,170
is essential to my own happiness.
802
00:45:56,460 --> 00:45:57,460
Trust me.
803
00:46:09,390 --> 00:46:10,470
I have an idea.
804
00:46:10,850 --> 00:46:11,850
Body Politic.
805
00:46:12,060 --> 00:46:14,270
Wait. Doesn't your friend
Margot work there?
806
00:46:14,350 --> 00:46:15,350
Mm-hmm.
807
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:16,600
Give me five minutes.
808
00:46:18,190 --> 00:46:19,400
Should I wear my sweatshirt?
809
00:46:20,190 --> 00:46:21,570
Yes.
810
00:46:22,900 --> 00:46:23,900
Let's go.
811
00:46:23,980 --> 00:46:25,860
Yo, we're going to Body Politic!
812
00:46:44,550 --> 00:46:46,170
What a pretty girl!
813
00:46:46,260 --> 00:46:47,260
Yeah!
814
00:46:55,350 --> 00:46:56,980
Hey, those are my glasses.
815
00:46:57,600 --> 00:46:59,020
Those are your feelings.
816
00:47:00,020 --> 00:47:01,020
Yeah, whatever.
817
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:03,690
Girl, stop pouting. Come see who's here.
818
00:47:09,030 --> 00:47:11,030
Yeah!
819
00:47:15,290 --> 00:47:17,290
Ah-he-he-he-hem!
820
00:47:18,710 --> 00:47:20,040
Three of Cups, old lady?
821
00:47:20,250 --> 00:47:21,380
Three of Cups!
822
00:47:22,250 --> 00:47:23,420
Now, where's a drink?
823
00:47:23,500 --> 00:47:26,710
Sherry? I don't know if I have
a goblet for you, though.
824
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:28,880
Fuck that! Just give me
a shot of somethin'.
825
00:47:29,380 --> 00:47:30,760
All right, okay.
826
00:47:30,840 --> 00:47:32,510
Shall we?
827
00:47:33,220 --> 00:47:34,470
Oh!
828
00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:36,560
Mm!
829
00:47:36,640 --> 00:47:37,770
Aah!
830
00:47:41,520 --> 00:47:42,520
Selfie!
831
00:47:42,770 --> 00:47:43,810
Mwah!
832
00:47:44,940 --> 00:47:46,650
Hey! How are you, girl?
833
00:47:48,690 --> 00:47:50,820
I'm glad we got you out of the house.
834
00:47:51,910 --> 00:47:53,870
To long nights in short skirts.
835
00:48:14,430 --> 00:48:16,640
Thank you, ukulele!
836
00:48:17,180 --> 00:48:18,430
Thank you!
837
00:48:22,560 --> 00:48:24,690
♪ I got nipples on my titties ♪
838
00:48:24,770 --> 00:48:27,070
♪ Big as the end of my thumb ♪
839
00:48:27,440 --> 00:48:29,230
♪ I got somethin' between my legs ♪
840
00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:31,530
♪ Will make a dead man come ♪
841
00:48:31,610 --> 00:48:32,610
Get it, Carlin.
842
00:48:32,700 --> 00:48:34,240
- ♪ Oh, Daddy ♪
- Woo!
843
00:48:34,660 --> 00:48:37,080
♪ Baby, won't you shave 'em dry? ♪
844
00:48:37,160 --> 00:48:38,290
Woo!
845
00:48:40,080 --> 00:48:43,040
♪ Want you to grind me, baby ♪
846
00:48:43,460 --> 00:48:46,420
♪ Grind me until I cry ♪
847
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:50,460
Raven, we just hit 100,000 followers.
848
00:48:51,090 --> 00:48:52,130
We're gonna be rich.
849
00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:54,690
I mean, this is gonna redefine
how we think of the intersection
850
00:48:54,720 --> 00:48:55,930
of art and commerce.
851
00:48:58,140 --> 00:49:00,140
♪ See, I fucked all night ♪
852
00:49:00,220 --> 00:49:02,980
♪ And all the night before, baby ♪
853
00:49:03,060 --> 00:49:06,940
♪ And I feel just like I
wanna fuck some more ♪
854
00:49:07,610 --> 00:49:10,400
♪ Oh, great God, Daddy ♪
855
00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:13,200
♪ Grind me honey, shave me dry ♪
856
00:49:15,910 --> 00:49:18,780
♪ When you hear me holla, baby ♪
857
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:21,700
♪ Want you to shave me dry ♪
858
00:49:24,580 --> 00:49:27,380
♪ I'm gonna turn back my mattress ♪
859
00:49:27,830 --> 00:49:29,960
♪ Let you on my springs ♪
860
00:49:30,050 --> 00:49:32,210
♪ I want you to grind me ♪
861
00:49:32,300 --> 00:49:34,720
♪ Till the bell do ring ♪
862
00:49:34,800 --> 00:49:37,050
♪ Oh, Daddy ♪
863
00:49:37,720 --> 00:49:40,600
♪ Want you to shave me dry ♪
864
00:49:43,520 --> 00:49:45,600
♪ Oh, hang on, Daddy ♪
865
00:49:45,690 --> 00:49:47,270
♪ If you can't shave 'em, baby ♪
866
00:49:47,350 --> 00:49:49,560
♪ Won't you try? ♪
867
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:54,240
♪ Now if fuckin' was the thing ♪
868
00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:56,530
♪ That would take me to Heaven ♪
869
00:49:56,610 --> 00:49:58,370
♪ I'd be fuckin' in the studio ♪
870
00:49:58,450 --> 00:50:01,240
♪ Till the clock strike eleven ♪
871
00:50:01,330 --> 00:50:03,370
♪ Oh, Daddy ♪
872
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,920
♪ Daddy, shave 'em dry ♪
873
00:50:09,670 --> 00:50:12,590
♪ I would fuck you, baby ♪
874
00:50:12,840 --> 00:50:15,630
♪ Honey, I'd make you cry... ♪
875
00:50:17,380 --> 00:50:18,970
Hi, I'm back.
876
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:21,220
Which you can see because I'm here.
877
00:50:21,300 --> 00:50:23,350
So I probably didn't need
to say that, but I just...
878
00:50:23,430 --> 00:50:26,520
I... I wanted to let you know
that I signed my divorce papers.
879
00:50:26,600 --> 00:50:27,850
- And so...
- Mary Ann.
880
00:50:28,190 --> 00:50:31,110
For the love of God, would you
please, for once, just shut up?
881
00:50:31,190 --> 00:50:34,990
♪ I would fuck you, baby ♪
882
00:50:35,070 --> 00:50:39,530
♪ Honey, I would make you cry ♪
883
00:50:41,450 --> 00:50:43,490
- God, I've missed this.
- Me, too.
884
00:50:43,580 --> 00:50:44,620
- I've missed you.
- Oh...
885
00:50:45,040 --> 00:50:46,250
Mary Ann.
886
00:50:47,540 --> 00:50:48,620
Mm!
887
00:50:48,870 --> 00:50:50,630
- Mm! Mary Ann.
- Yes.
888
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:51,710
- Mm!
- Oh.
889
00:50:51,790 --> 00:50:53,210
- Mary Ann... Oh!
- What?
890
00:50:53,300 --> 00:50:54,960
- What? What is it?
- Ow!
891
00:50:55,630 --> 00:50:57,300
- What?
- It's my... my knee. Shit.
892
00:50:57,380 --> 00:50:58,550
What is it? What?
893
00:50:58,630 --> 00:51:00,100
Just that the knee locks up,
894
00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:01,140
- that's it.
- You want ice?
895
00:51:01,180 --> 00:51:02,450
- Oh...
- Do you need ice?
896
00:51:02,470 --> 00:51:04,310
Just give me a minute.
897
00:51:04,390 --> 00:51:07,980
- We don't have to do this.
- No, it's... Maybe if you turn over.
898
00:51:08,390 --> 00:51:09,560
- Oh. Okay.
- Yeah.
899
00:51:09,640 --> 00:51:12,110
- No, no, no, no, no. Carpal tunnel.
- Oh.
900
00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:14,320
- Okay.
- Uh...
901
00:51:14,860 --> 00:51:16,360
- What if I get on top?
- Yeah.
902
00:51:16,650 --> 00:51:17,650
Yeah?
903
00:51:20,570 --> 00:51:21,950
How's that? You okay?
904
00:51:22,990 --> 00:51:23,990
That's fantastic.
905
00:51:25,450 --> 00:51:26,450
And you?
906
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:30,920
Fantastic.
907
00:51:43,390 --> 00:51:44,390
Good night.
908
00:51:47,100 --> 00:51:48,100
Mm!
909
00:51:48,390 --> 00:51:49,390
I love you.
910
00:51:49,980 --> 00:51:51,100
I love you, too.
911
00:51:51,730 --> 00:51:52,730
Mm.
912
00:51:54,270 --> 00:51:55,270
Mm!
913
00:51:55,820 --> 00:51:57,360
Just remember, NDQ.
914
00:51:57,440 --> 00:51:58,440
Too soon.
915
00:51:58,490 --> 00:51:59,490
Come on.
916
00:52:33,350 --> 00:52:35,270
Brian? Did you forget some...
917
00:52:40,690 --> 00:52:41,780
Uh... Mm...
918
00:52:45,870 --> 00:52:47,030
That's a cool shirt.
919
00:52:48,490 --> 00:52:50,000
My dad has one just like it.
920
00:52:53,040 --> 00:52:54,920
He went out to get bagels.
He'll be right back.
921
00:53:01,260 --> 00:53:02,260
Mary Ann.
922
00:53:03,380 --> 00:53:04,430
You blushing?
923
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:05,760
Um...
924
00:53:09,010 --> 00:53:11,140
- We, um...
- Hey. Relax.
925
00:53:12,270 --> 00:53:15,480
I'm not in any position to judge
anyone else's choices right now.
926
00:53:17,770 --> 00:53:18,940
Are you okay?
927
00:53:21,820 --> 00:53:23,950
Something happen? You
wanna talk about it?
928
00:53:25,610 --> 00:53:28,530
What do you do if you've lived
your life by your instincts...
929
00:53:30,290 --> 00:53:32,370
and it turns out your instincts suck?
930
00:53:33,370 --> 00:53:34,370
Mm.
931
00:53:36,580 --> 00:53:39,540
That's a question I've
never been able to answer.
932
00:53:47,180 --> 00:53:48,180
What's in the box?
933
00:53:48,600 --> 00:53:51,720
Just some old photos of my dad's.
Barbary Lane back in the day.
934
00:53:54,060 --> 00:53:56,060
- Can I see?
- Yeah. Of course.
935
00:53:56,350 --> 00:53:58,190
There's piles of them in the closet.
936
00:53:58,610 --> 00:54:00,610
I had no idea he had all this.
937
00:54:01,320 --> 00:54:04,280
- Huh.
- It's so cute. You guys look so young.
938
00:54:04,360 --> 00:54:05,360
Yeah.
939
00:54:07,070 --> 00:54:09,410
Michael, your dad and
I, we must have been...
940
00:54:09,490 --> 00:54:12,040
Yeah, we must have been about your age.
941
00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:15,500
And Anna was probably my age now.
942
00:54:15,580 --> 00:54:17,000
God, that's hard to believe.
943
00:54:21,130 --> 00:54:22,170
Hm.
944
00:54:24,130 --> 00:54:25,260
Oh, yeah, that's good.
945
00:54:25,340 --> 00:54:27,300
- Put that in the pile for Anna.
- Mm.
946
00:54:31,350 --> 00:54:32,890
Aww, look.
947
00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:35,140
One when I smoked.
948
00:54:37,310 --> 00:54:38,520
I was stupid.
949
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:54,040
Who the fuck is Connie Bradshaw?
950
00:54:59,040 --> 00:55:03,800
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