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WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
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Dean? Dean?
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Don't shoot, red-haired guy.
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Why not?
Something's not right about the game.
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We just took out
a professional paintball assassin.
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A professional?
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Aah!
That doesn't make sense.
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Why would someone who gets paid
to do things be at Greendale?
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Aah! No! No, no!
I'm not playing! I'm not playing!
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No, I'm the dean!
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Stop shooting me! Aah!
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- Man's down.
- Copy that.
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Hi, Pistol Patty.
Did they take you hostage?
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Dean Spreck?
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Hello, Craig.
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City College.
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Now I understand everything.
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Now your whole evil plan
is clear as day.
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But if you need to explain it
to your men, I understand.
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It's simple, Craig.
I pose as a fake ice cream company,
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sponsor your
end-of-the-year picnic
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and waved enough money
under your students' noses
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to provoke them to destroy
their own campus.
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Who hurt you, Steven?
How could any dean be so mean?
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Oh, you haven't seen how mean
this dean can be-ean.
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- There's one.
- Go!
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- After them.
- Go, go, go!
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Wait, did you say "bean"?
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Guys. Guys! City College is
trying to destroy Greendale.
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They're an unstoppable juggle knob.
"Juggernaut."
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Juggernaut. Which means,
if we're gonna fight them,
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we have to form
a school-wide alliance of rebels.
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It seems we've left the Western motif and
are entering a Star Wars scenario.
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- Aw.
- I wish it happened sooner too.
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If we surrender our individuality
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to form a faceless regime,
how are we better?
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You're the worst.
Okay, she is just saying that to fit in.
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The floor recognizes Magnitude.
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First off:
Pop, pop!
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I love it.
Second, Magnitude's a one-man party.
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A one-man party can't be in an alliance.
That's a paradox.
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I agree to disagree.
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We trashed it.
We still might hit them where it hurts.
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Their balls?
No.
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Just below their balls?
Their wallet, Leonard.
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I think it's called a "taint."
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Why do you think
they sent in a ringer to win?
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It must be because we're entitled
to the prize they promised,
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a hundred G's.
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Ooh, I could use that money.
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This is why we have to agree,
right now,
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that whoever wins,
we give the money to Greendale.
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No!
What?!
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To repair the damage and save our school.
Abed, tell them.
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Whatever. I ain't in it for your revolution.
I'm in it for me.
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Wait, Abed, this was your idea.
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But I'm calling dibs on the Han Solo
role before Jeff slouches into it.
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Star-Burns, I need that vest.
Pfft. Oh, yeah, right.
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Give me the vest, laser breath,
before our conversation gets nasty.
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Question. How long is the game gonna last?
Andre's home with the baby...
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Shirley, forget your newborn child and
think about the people that need you.
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I can't afford to lose a single soldier.
What?
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Oh, now you're the leader?
I don't see you stepping up.
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I don't step up to being leader.
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I reluctantly accept it
when it's thrust upon me.
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- Oh, Jeff.
- You know, you're an idiot.
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Oh, my God. What is that?
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Oh, my God, is he okay?
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Magnitude.
Pop...
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Po... P...
"Pop?" Pop what? Pop what?
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What is he trying to say?
Pop what, Magnitude?!
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You sons of bitches.
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Can you hear me?
Who is this?
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Oh, that's Jeff Winger.
You are in trouble now.
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Jeffrey, it's your friend,
the dean. I'm safe.
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Sit down.
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I can hear you, Mr. Winger.
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This is City College's Dean Spreck.
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Hey, Spreck, you cheat.
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You can't spray people with paint
by remote.
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And you can't have City College
students in a Greendale game.
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My men have been registered
at Greendale for weeks.
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As for rules, they're clearly defined
in your school's agreement
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with my fake ice-cream company.
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If you get paint on you, you're out.
I'm glad to see there's paperwork,
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because we are going to win,
and you are gonna pay.
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Yay! Go, Jeff Winger's study group.
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Those guys are ballers, yo.
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I hope you like getting balled.
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Sir, this guy tried to charge us
three paintballs to use the bathroom.
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We were gonna shoot him,
but tell him what you told us.
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Don't shoot me.
Great. Now shoot him.
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Sure, shoot me.
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You'd certainly be doing Jeff Winger
a big favor.
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Greendale Human Beings,
it is now clear
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that we have no choice but to
team up and defeat City College.
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I also have no choice
but to accept the role thrust upon me.
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And what role would that be?
No time to squabble, Troy.
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"For Greendale," on three.
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One, two...
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Jeff, every second counts.
"For Greendale," on two.
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One...
Guys.
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- For Greendale!
- For Greendale!
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Greendale students,
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I understand you've unified
and intend to draw this game out.
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Well, if it's a war you want,
it's a war you will lose.
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City College is stronger, faster.
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Our sperm counts are higher,
even in our women.
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Resistance is as pointless
as your degrees.
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Honestly, ask yourself, what
does "Liberal Arts" even mean?
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- "Welcome to Greendale.
- You're already accepted."
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Ha. Losers.
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What the hell?
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Welcome to Greendale.
You're already dead.
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Jackpot. Shirley, you keep watch
while we get these.
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Here, help me with this.
Sure thing, your worship.
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Abed. Stop trying to be Han Solo,
it's making me embarrassed for you.
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Come on, admit it, you like it.
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I like having conversations
with adults.
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Playing Star Wars is worn out
and immature.
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You like me because I'm immature.
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There's not enough immaturity
in your life.
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I hope I don't get shot
waiting out here.
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I'd hate to go home to my babies.
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Reconnaissance indicates
the key to City College's strategy is
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the Gatling gun
inside the ice-cream truck,
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which we'll charge en masse,
overwhelming their defenses,
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and taking that gun for ourselves.
Well, that's not how I would proceed.
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Do you happen to have a better plan?
I do happen, Jeff. I happen very much.
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We use sneak attacks
to draw their patrols to the library,
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where one of us will pull the fire
alarm, activating the sprinklers,
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which I will have rigged,
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to shower everything in the building
with paint.
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Paint in sprinklers?
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Are we the Little Rascals?
I was.
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Have you heard your plan?
You wanna charge a machine gun.
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I've got something to say.
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I don't take orders from girls,
because they don't talk to me.
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Watch it, quasar face.
Annie's a good kid and a better shot.
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So listen up
or you'll be floating home.
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Thank you, Abed.
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Sorry..."Han."
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Okay, I think we should
split the troops in half
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and carry out both plans
simultaneously.
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Troy, your plan will lure people
off the ice cream truck,
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allowing Jeff's troops
to take the stronghold.
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You're welcome.
You're welcome.
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I'm so glad that we didn't shoot you.
Now we have the advantage
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of knowing that Jeff Winger
wants to be a ballerina
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and that his Achilles heel
is..."wieners."
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That's just the tip of the iceberg.
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For one more pudding,
I'll tell you why he's jealous of me.
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They kicked you out of study group
after two years?
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Yeah.
What took them so long?
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Hey, thanks for sticking up
for me back there.
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This group gets so tangled
in each others' feelings.
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You're a hero
for standing outside of it.
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Heroes are great,
but I'll take a blaster every time.
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Anyway, just wanted to let you know,
I don't think you're immature.
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I think you're great,
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for a no-good, laser-faced,
Jabba scoundrel.
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You're good, kid. Don't get cocky.
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Hey!
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- Ow! Ow! Damn, my leg.
- Take cover.
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They're right on our tail.
167
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Operation Troy's Awesome Plan
is living up to its name.
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Good for you.
169
00:09:28,834 --> 00:09:30,597
Looks like they're taking Troy's bait.
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Squad B commencing
Operation Actual Operation.
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Everyone look alive.
Leonard, good enough.
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Greendale,
it's been a pleasure fighting with you.
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Some of us won't make it,
but there is a place
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where we will see each other again,
and that place is Denny's.
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Which Denny's?
We'll figure it out later.
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The one near the 15 exit,
I'm banned.
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Then I'll see you in hell.
Let's kick some taint.
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Okay. On my count.
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One, two...
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Vicki!
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- Go, go, go.
- Lock the doors. Seal the room.
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00:10:18,517 --> 00:10:21,418
All right, Shirley, you have
the most important job, okay?
183
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:22,815
Yeah, pull the fire alarm.
184
00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:25,081
Can we move this along?
I'm missing CSI.
185
00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:26,417
Enemy soldiers are incoming.
186
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:29,390
Everyone evacuate through
the air ve...
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00:10:29,595 --> 00:10:32,826
- Garrett.
- I may be stuck in this vent.
188
00:10:33,032 --> 00:10:34,397
It is too early to tell.
189
00:10:39,005 --> 00:10:41,599
- They're all over the place.
- They're all over the place.
190
00:10:50,182 --> 00:10:53,151
I think our only choice is
to try and shoot our way out.
191
00:10:53,452 --> 00:10:54,441
Right.
192
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:59,390
Commence Operation Troy's Awesome
Leadership is Never in Doubt.
193
00:11:05,831 --> 00:11:07,025
Ugh!
194
00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:13,767
That's affirmative.
195
00:11:14,473 --> 00:11:17,340
That gun's too powerful.
I'm scared.
196
00:11:17,576 --> 00:11:20,272
Hey, Quendra with a "Q-U,"
197
00:11:20,479 --> 00:11:23,676
they can kill most of us,
but as long as nobody gives up,
198
00:11:23,883 --> 00:11:26,977
somebody will make it through.
Understand?
199
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:28,813
Yes.
200
00:11:29,455 --> 00:11:32,151
Charge!
201
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:35,290
Well, I'm out. We lost.
202
00:11:35,494 --> 00:11:38,361
See you at Denny's?
Denny's is for winners.
203
00:11:38,597 --> 00:11:41,498
We've got two Human Beings
trapped outside of the library.
204
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:44,329
- Keep them pinned down.
- It won't be long now.
205
00:11:56,015 --> 00:11:59,644
Leonard, we're losing.
Britta, I've been in a few real wars,
206
00:11:59,852 --> 00:12:02,082
but this one is actually
the most terrifying.
207
00:12:02,855 --> 00:12:04,482
Guys, we're dying out here.
208
00:12:04,690 --> 00:12:06,157
Well, we're dying too.
209
00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:09,220
They've trapped us in a dead end.
210
00:12:09,428 --> 00:12:12,420
Hey, kid. Someone's gotta
make it out of here alive.
211
00:12:19,004 --> 00:12:21,234
- We're taking fire.
- We're pulling back.
212
00:12:21,507 --> 00:12:23,771
Pulling back.
Fall back to placement positions.
213
00:12:24,276 --> 00:12:26,176
We're gonna need help.
214
00:12:29,281 --> 00:12:31,010
I had a dream it would end this way.
215
00:12:31,383 --> 00:12:33,112
Take him.
216
00:12:36,322 --> 00:12:39,758
Shirley, nobody's making it out
of the library. Pull the alarm.
217
00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:41,950
Britta, are you alive?
218
00:12:42,161 --> 00:12:43,423
Britta? Britta?
219
00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:48,431
Aw, hell. Someone's gotta win this.
220
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:52,135
Aw. I'm eliminated.
221
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:58,103
I'm out.
Me too.
222
00:12:58,644 --> 00:13:00,908
Alpha 17, move in.
223
00:13:02,414 --> 00:13:04,575
Looks like this is it.
224
00:13:05,317 --> 00:13:06,944
Will you be Han Solo after we die?
225
00:13:07,153 --> 00:13:09,951
Afraid not, doll.
Once I'm gone, I'm gone.
226
00:13:10,322 --> 00:13:11,619
Oh.
227
00:13:11,991 --> 00:13:13,424
Okay.
228
00:13:19,198 --> 00:13:21,393
Ugh, gotta do everything myself.
229
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:52,524
- We're all dead. All of us.
- Paint is raining from the sky.
230
00:13:52,731 --> 00:13:54,358
Everyone in the library is dead.
231
00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:56,192
Damn it.
232
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:01,769
Kill him.
233
00:14:01,974 --> 00:14:03,874
Yes, sir.
234
00:14:07,046 --> 00:14:10,504
Unh... It's my heart.
235
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:12,578
Buddy, you okay?
236
00:14:17,223 --> 00:14:19,088
Cool.
237
00:14:22,127 --> 00:14:23,287
Hoo.
238
00:14:23,495 --> 00:14:29,195
Eat paint, you Stormtrooping,
City College knob gobblers.
239
00:14:30,135 --> 00:14:32,660
- Codger down.
- You're it, kid.
240
00:14:33,939 --> 00:14:35,338
Covering the right flank.
241
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,605
Okay, looks like we got her.
242
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,150
Shirley.
243
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:58,558
What are we supposed to do?
How about we save this school's ass?
244
00:14:58,797 --> 00:15:00,059
Deal.
245
00:15:03,669 --> 00:15:05,637
Go, go, go.
246
00:15:19,184 --> 00:15:20,344
Hold on.
247
00:15:20,953 --> 00:15:22,443
Hold on!
248
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,118
- Unh!
- Yeah!
249
00:15:26,325 --> 00:15:28,418
- You'd better watch it.
- Oh!
250
00:15:29,061 --> 00:15:31,188
Aw.
251
00:15:31,397 --> 00:15:33,388
That's it. I think that's it.
Is that it?
252
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:35,362
We win.
We won!
253
00:15:35,567 --> 00:15:38,035
Oh! We win. We win!
254
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:39,294
Jeffrey.
255
00:15:42,574 --> 00:15:43,871
Unh!
256
00:15:45,244 --> 00:15:46,609
- We win.
- We win.
257
00:15:46,812 --> 00:15:48,609
- Yes. Ha, ha, ha.
- What?
258
00:15:48,814 --> 00:15:49,872
All right.
259
00:15:50,349 --> 00:15:51,873
Way to shoot.
260
00:15:52,084 --> 00:15:54,484
- All right, we did it.
- Yeah, way to go.
261
00:15:54,720 --> 00:15:56,051
Yes.
Who are you?
262
00:15:56,255 --> 00:15:57,984
Your mother's lover.
Unh!
263
00:15:58,223 --> 00:15:59,383
- What?
- What?
264
00:15:59,591 --> 00:16:00,785
- That's low.
- Oh, man.
265
00:16:00,993 --> 00:16:03,484
I win.
266
00:16:05,664 --> 00:16:07,063
- All right!
- All right!
267
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:08,891
You owe me a hundred G's.
268
00:16:10,769 --> 00:16:14,637
And you can make the check out
to Greendale.
269
00:16:20,245 --> 00:16:22,577
Human Beings! Human Beings!
270
00:16:22,781 --> 00:16:25,272
Human Beings! Human Beings!
271
00:16:25,484 --> 00:16:27,952
Human Beings! Human Beings!
272
00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:40,958
- Thank you.
- Oh, that's very good.
273
00:16:41,467 --> 00:16:42,695
- Okay.
- It's nice.
274
00:16:42,901 --> 00:16:45,665
Final meeting of the semester
now in session.
275
00:16:45,871 --> 00:16:48,999
Final order of business, pick a
class we can all take in the fall.
276
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:51,108
We could just take Anthro 201.
277
00:16:51,310 --> 00:16:53,505
Risky. Sequels are almost
always disappointing.
278
00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:56,704
Since when are you in favor
of playing it safe, Han?
279
00:16:56,915 --> 00:16:58,007
Cool down, Annie.
280
00:16:58,217 --> 00:17:02,051
I was only Han Solo because the
context demanded it. But here.
281
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,620
Oh. Star-Burns.
282
00:17:06,825 --> 00:17:08,452
He uses a crystal
instead of deodorant.
283
00:17:08,660 --> 00:17:10,958
Guys, I know exactly
what we should do.
284
00:17:11,163 --> 00:17:13,256
We should see what Troy thinks
we should do.
285
00:17:14,666 --> 00:17:17,066
He had some good ideas today.
Thanks, man.
286
00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:21,002
Okay.
287
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:25,074
I've given this a lot of thought, and
I've decided we should sleep on it.
288
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:29,211
Just came back for
my day planner.
289
00:17:29,415 --> 00:17:32,077
Pretend I'm not even here.
You guys are great at that.
290
00:17:32,317 --> 00:17:35,980
Come on, Pierce. We all know
there is no "day planner."
291
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:37,177
Here it is.
292
00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:41,553
If you'll excuse me, I'm running late to
drink a bottle of wine in my bathing suit.
293
00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:43,227
Pierce, wait.
294
00:17:47,699 --> 00:17:50,725
You know I've been coming
to this school for 12 years?
295
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:54,266
And I've never been friends
with anyone here
296
00:17:54,473 --> 00:17:56,737
more than a semester.
297
00:17:56,942 --> 00:17:59,740
Probably for the same reason
I've been married seven times.
298
00:17:59,945 --> 00:18:03,346
I guess I assume, eventually,
I'll be rejected.
299
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:09,385
So I, you know, test people,
push them, until they prove me right.
300
00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:11,579
It's a sickness. I admit it.
301
00:18:11,790 --> 00:18:15,954
But this place has always
accepted me, sickness and all.
302
00:18:16,161 --> 00:18:18,755
This place accepted all of you,
303
00:18:18,964 --> 00:18:21,398
sickness and all.
It's worth thinking about.
304
00:18:23,068 --> 00:18:27,095
Um, I think we have thought about it,
Pierce, and you're right.
305
00:18:27,606 --> 00:18:32,270
And we were just picking a class
we could all be in this fall.
306
00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:35,212
And we'd love for you to join us.
307
00:18:37,916 --> 00:18:40,908
No, thanks. I'm done with you guys.
308
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:45,386
I like this school, but I'm done
with whatever you call this. Adiós.
309
00:18:48,393 --> 00:18:50,122
He was my ride.
I'm going after him.
310
00:18:50,329 --> 00:18:54,095
No, he's just acting out.
I've seen this behavior before.
311
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:57,063
In cats. My cats.
312
00:18:57,269 --> 00:19:00,932
It's true.
And now he'll come slinking back
313
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:07,636
in five, four, three, two...