1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.COM
1
00:00:18,818 --> 00:00:23,016
Ooh. Nice day out today, isn't it?
Yeah, shoot.
2
00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:25,719
You forget something?
3
00:00:25,925 --> 00:00:28,792
Yeah, I forgot to stagger the timing
of my exit with Shirley's.
4
00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,155
We both have a class
across campus
5
00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:31,762
and I can't go that kind
of distance with
6
00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:33,398
"Oh, that's nice."
7
00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,591
That's mean.
No, that's not nice.
8
00:00:35,802 --> 00:00:38,168
I find Shirley very easy to talk to.
9
00:00:38,371 --> 00:00:41,898
Besides, aren't you supposed to have like
an Olympic gold medal in jibber jabber?
10
00:00:42,108 --> 00:00:43,871
Yeah, but I'm a sprinter.
11
00:00:44,077 --> 00:00:46,409
I'm at my best
during high speed bursts of wit.
12
00:00:46,613 --> 00:00:49,480
On a Shirley walk,
I'd be winded by that stoner tree.
13
00:00:49,682 --> 00:00:51,115
Hey, Britta. Hi.
14
00:00:51,317 --> 00:00:53,080
What's up?
Hey, Vaughn, how's it going?
15
00:00:53,286 --> 00:00:54,981
No worries.
Interesting.
16
00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:58,385
Because I might be worried if I was
playing hacky sack a decade too late.
17
00:00:58,591 --> 00:00:59,888
My class is that way.
18
00:01:00,093 --> 00:01:02,323
All right. I just want to point
out that we easily walked
19
00:01:02,529 --> 00:01:04,997
more than a hundred yards
with no awkward pauses.
20
00:01:05,198 --> 00:01:08,031
And that is the sign of a true friend.
So...
21
00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:10,532
I'm really glad you're not hitting
on me anymore.
22
00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:13,535
There's the awkward pause.
23
00:01:15,341 --> 00:01:16,569
Aah!
24
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:25,441
Excuse me. Oh, pardon me.
25
00:01:25,652 --> 00:01:29,315
Professor Duncan. Professor Duncan.
Uh, ooh, sorry.
26
00:01:29,522 --> 00:01:30,511
Annie Edison,
27
00:01:30,723 --> 00:01:32,122
I'm in your 101 lecture.
Oh. Hello.
28
00:01:32,325 --> 00:01:33,792
I've heard about
your special psych lab.
29
00:01:33,993 --> 00:01:35,654
Ah. The Duncan Principle.
Yes.
30
00:01:35,862 --> 00:01:39,662
And I know it's limited to second year
students, but I had a 4.0 at Riverside High.
31
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,891
And I'm not looking down
on this school at all.
32
00:01:42,102 --> 00:01:43,831
But I'm only here because of
a brief addiction to pills
33
00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:45,698
that I was told would
help me focus
34
00:01:45,905 --> 00:01:47,065
but they actually made me lose
35
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:49,138
my scholarship and virginity.
Right.
36
00:01:49,342 --> 00:01:52,334
If you will let me take your lab early, it
would be a real feather in my transcript.
37
00:01:52,545 --> 00:01:56,572
Okay. I've actually been in this situation
many times, so I'm just gonna be upfront.
38
00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,410
I'm not allowed to date students.
39
00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:00,682
Oh.
But if in spite of that
40
00:02:00,887 --> 00:02:02,582
you are still interested,
then you may join the lab.
41
00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,051
Oh!
Ah.
42
00:02:04,257 --> 00:02:07,249
Okay, you need to bring
two human subjects.
43
00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,087
I asked politely
and the panda took his pants off.
44
00:02:11,197 --> 00:02:13,825
I never even knew
that's what asexual meant.
45
00:02:14,033 --> 00:02:16,228
I wonder what this express package
could be.
46
00:02:16,436 --> 00:02:18,802
Somebody had to get something
to me very fast.
47
00:02:19,005 --> 00:02:20,802
You brought your mail to campus.
48
00:02:21,007 --> 00:02:22,998
Oh, yes. My Ear-Noculars.
49
00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:24,198
What is that?
50
00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:26,378
It looks like your blue-tooth thingy.
No, no, no.
51
00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:28,342
This is my cell phone headset.
52
00:02:28,548 --> 00:02:32,484
And this is Ear-Noculars.
53
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:35,784
It's for spies and what-not.
Gives you sonic hearing.
54
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,616
All hearing is sonic.
What's that?
55
00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:40,156
So who wants to be
in a psych experiment?
56
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:45,229
Hey, guys, guys. Annie is talking
about some kind of experiment.
57
00:02:45,431 --> 00:02:47,160
She's behind you. Not interested.
58
00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:49,330
Please. You get paid.
59
00:02:49,536 --> 00:02:52,004
Do they do stuff to your butt?
No.
60
00:02:52,205 --> 00:02:55,003
Do you get paid more
if they do stuff to your butt?
61
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:57,233
No.
It's fine, I'll do it, I'm in.
62
00:02:57,443 --> 00:02:59,468
Yay. How about you, Abed?
It's tomorrow.
63
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:03,012
Oof. Tomorrow, they're showing
all four Indiana Joneses at The Vista.
64
00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:05,878
I'm really looking forward to the first three.
I bought a whip.
65
00:03:06,085 --> 00:03:07,712
This is really
important to me, Abed.
66
00:03:07,921 --> 00:03:10,856
Could you please go as my friend?
My really good friend?
67
00:03:11,057 --> 00:03:13,355
Well, I didn't realize
we were really good friends.
68
00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:15,118
I figured we were really
more like Chandler and Phoebe.
69
00:03:15,328 --> 00:03:17,387
They never really had stories
together.
70
00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:20,494
Sure, I'll do it, Chandler.
Oh, thank you, Abed.
71
00:03:21,067 --> 00:03:22,694
Oh.
I'm gonna go save Britta
72
00:03:22,902 --> 00:03:23,891
from that dude.
73
00:03:24,103 --> 00:03:25,866
Yeah,
she looks like she's in trouble.
74
00:03:26,072 --> 00:03:28,666
Hope he doesn't try
to handsome her to death. Ha-ha.
75
00:03:30,076 --> 00:03:31,338
Hey.
What's up, man?
76
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:32,568
Hi, I'm Vaughn.
77
00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:34,303
You in line?
Oh, no, no.
78
00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:35,674
We're just, uh...
We're just chilling.
79
00:03:36,649 --> 00:03:39,675
Hey, you're not gonna order coffee?
Oh, no, I was just seeing if Britta...
80
00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:41,683
No judgment, bro.
I used to do coffee.
81
00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:44,015
Then I made the switch
to green tea,
82
00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:47,421
it's like filled with these antioxidants
and stuff.
83
00:03:48,127 --> 00:03:49,719
It's pretty tight.
Tight.
84
00:03:49,929 --> 00:03:52,056
Yes, I've heard that about green tea.
85
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:54,290
I like green tea.
I should make the change.
86
00:03:54,500 --> 00:03:56,559
Up top, sugar bear.
87
00:03:56,769 --> 00:03:59,237
Yeah, give me some of that.
Small coffee, please.
88
00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:02,198
Britta's making the change
to green tea.
89
00:04:03,209 --> 00:04:04,403
Good. It'll be a scandal.
90
00:04:05,111 --> 00:04:06,874
Welcome, research assistants.
91
00:04:07,447 --> 00:04:09,244
Turn your attention
to the monitor,
92
00:04:09,449 --> 00:04:12,384
you will see that our subjects are
waiting for the experiment to begin.
93
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:16,715
But it's actually happening
right now.
94
00:04:17,624 --> 00:04:21,151
You see, the waiting is the experiment.
The Duncan Principle is simple.
95
00:04:21,361 --> 00:04:25,024
Namely, the more control lost by...
Yeah, I'm gonna write this down too, actually.
96
00:04:25,231 --> 00:04:26,391
That's a good point.
97
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:31,832
The more control lost by the ego,
the more gained by the id.
98
00:04:32,038 --> 00:04:34,506
Resulting
in a surprisingly predictable,
99
00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:38,006
emotional eruption
or breaking point.
100
00:04:38,444 --> 00:04:42,904
Known to Ma and Pa
as a good old-fashioned tantrum.
101
00:04:44,751 --> 00:04:47,083
Oh. Annie.
102
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,221
Why don't you, uh, go
and tell our subjects
103
00:04:49,422 --> 00:04:52,084
that we're gonna be starting
the experiment in five minutes, okay?
104
00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:56,991
And, Annie,
105
00:04:57,530 --> 00:04:59,259
it's never actually going to start.
106
00:05:01,034 --> 00:05:02,865
Ha-ha-ha.
107
00:05:03,469 --> 00:05:05,528
I like that, all day.
108
00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:14,077
Hi, everyone.
109
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:16,373
Hi, Troy. Hi, Abed.
110
00:05:17,016 --> 00:05:18,313
Hi, Senor Chang.
111
00:05:18,518 --> 00:05:22,045
What, community college
Spanish teacher can't use 80 bucks?
112
00:05:22,855 --> 00:05:25,653
Well, we're just running
a little bit behind,
113
00:05:25,858 --> 00:05:28,452
so we'll probably start in five
minutes.
114
00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,322
No, no, no.
115
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,896
No, no, no. Unacceptable.
116
00:05:33,099 --> 00:05:39,504
When you say something starts at 9,
it starts at nueve. Ah!
117
00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:44,003
No, no.
118
00:05:44,210 --> 00:05:46,508
And we're off.
119
00:05:57,790 --> 00:05:59,849
Did you know we walk the same way
after class?
120
00:06:00,059 --> 00:06:02,289
I'm sure you didn't or else we
would've been walking together,
121
00:06:02,495 --> 00:06:05,055
unless you're a jerk, hmm,
just kidding. Heh-heh.
122
00:06:05,264 --> 00:06:06,424
Let's do it.
Mm-hm.
123
00:06:06,632 --> 00:06:10,090
Don't go too fast for these dogs.
Short legs.
124
00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,968
Do you like Green...? What's that?
You got a kid, right? Nothing.
125
00:06:21,447 --> 00:06:24,416
So Pierce isn't exactly right
in the head, is he?
126
00:06:27,153 --> 00:06:30,554
I know a lot of grown men with radar
dishes coming out of their ears.
127
00:06:30,790 --> 00:06:32,189
He's like Inspector Gadget.
128
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:33,825
Yeah, go go gadget incontinence.
129
00:06:34,026 --> 00:06:36,187
How about that guy that's always
around flirting with Britta?
130
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,125
I know. He's the worst, Vaughn?
131
00:06:38,331 --> 00:06:40,697
I know. What is with his hair?
It's perpetually moist.
132
00:06:40,900 --> 00:06:43,494
Okay, we're three hours in,
let's review what we've seen.
133
00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:46,695
And pay close attention
to every subject's breaking point.
134
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:49,534
We've got a shouter.
135
00:06:49,742 --> 00:06:51,903
That one's a stomper. Bye, hippie.
136
00:06:52,578 --> 00:06:53,943
There's a generic whack job,
137
00:06:54,147 --> 00:06:56,911
bouncing up and down
like a 6-foot child.
138
00:06:57,116 --> 00:06:59,380
Shaking, write that down.
Visible shakes.
139
00:06:59,886 --> 00:07:02,548
Look at the little one
chase the big one, look at them go.
140
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:04,985
I can make them go quicker,
it's like Benny Hill.
141
00:07:05,191 --> 00:07:06,920
Whoo. Get them. Lightens the mood.
142
00:07:07,493 --> 00:07:09,984
And back to the present.
143
00:07:10,196 --> 00:07:12,562
And then there were two.
144
00:07:19,238 --> 00:07:22,401
Break, break.
145
00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:28,137
No, no, no. Annie.
146
00:07:28,347 --> 00:07:34,809
What is going on in there?
I wasted all day here for you.
147
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:38,113
The Soul Train Awards were tonight.
148
00:07:38,558 --> 00:07:39,991
You promised...
149
00:07:46,566 --> 00:07:47,999
And he's out. We got him.
150
00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:50,526
Professor,
what is with that last guy?
151
00:07:50,736 --> 00:07:52,636
I've seen this before.
152
00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:55,364
The longer they wait,
the harder they break.
153
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,340
Buckle up, students.
154
00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:59,903
Heh. See how often Hacky Sack
takes his shirt off?
155
00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:01,704
He'd play shirts and skins
in a game of checkers.
156
00:08:03,115 --> 00:08:05,049
I'm so glad to be able
to talk to someone about this.
157
00:08:05,251 --> 00:08:07,276
I wanted to say
something to Britta about it.
158
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:10,217
But we're supposed to be friends
now, she'd think I was jealous.
159
00:08:10,423 --> 00:08:12,050
I don't see why you and Britta
aren't together.
160
00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:14,783
Two white people going to school
together, just seems right.
161
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,791
Shirley, we're not pandas in a zoo.
162
00:08:18,397 --> 00:08:20,558
Oh. Oh, dear.
163
00:08:22,435 --> 00:08:25,029
That is not what I want to see.
164
00:08:29,308 --> 00:08:30,832
And there goes the shirt.
165
00:08:40,019 --> 00:08:42,749
Hey.
Hey, I'm fine. Oh.
166
00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:45,753
Want me to, uh, check you
for grass stains?
167
00:08:45,958 --> 00:08:49,291
I wasn't sure how or when to bring up
that I was hanging out with Vaughn.
168
00:08:49,495 --> 00:08:52,862
I figured that you'd make
fun of him and me.
169
00:08:53,499 --> 00:08:54,727
Oh, well... Uh...
170
00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:57,334
First of all, friends don't make fun
of each other,
171
00:08:57,537 --> 00:09:00,768
even if they're being tackled
in the quad by a hippie.
172
00:09:01,407 --> 00:09:06,276
And secondly, Vaughn seems cool.
173
00:09:08,748 --> 00:09:11,615
You guys should hang out
sometime.
174
00:09:13,152 --> 00:09:14,744
I gotta go. I, uh...
175
00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:18,412
That was tacky out there,
you won't ever see that again.
176
00:09:18,624 --> 00:09:20,057
Oh, no worries, brah.
177
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:29,167
Shirley.
178
00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:31,862
Did you see
Senor Chang's socks today?
179
00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:33,902
Tiny bullfighters.
Ha-ha.
180
00:09:34,106 --> 00:09:37,667
I can top that, did you see
that Hacky Sack wears an anklet?
181
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:41,644
Since when won't you talk
about Vaughn?
182
00:09:41,847 --> 00:09:44,338
I'm trying to be a good friend
to Britta.
183
00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:47,986
She thought I was gonna make fun of
him, but I want to be unpredictable.
184
00:09:48,854 --> 00:09:53,188
I'm going to show her that I'm
not the jerk she thinks I am.
185
00:09:53,392 --> 00:09:57,226
And friend the hell out of that
green-tea-drinking drum circler.
186
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,830
Okay. But tell me you noticed
how small his nipples are.
187
00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:02,933
Not engaging.
What? It's not gossip when it's fact.
188
00:10:03,135 --> 00:10:04,898
My kids got hamsters with big nips.
No.
189
00:10:05,104 --> 00:10:07,163
Oh, well. Jeff.
No.
190
00:10:09,942 --> 00:10:12,410
Is... Is it on pause?
191
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,012
No, that's just him.
192
00:10:19,986 --> 00:10:23,820
Sorry you've been waiting 26 hours.
193
00:10:24,023 --> 00:10:26,014
It's just going to be
another five minutes.
194
00:10:26,225 --> 00:10:27,487
Okey-dokey.
195
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,121
Okey-dokey.
Oh, my...
196
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:32,155
Why won't he leave?
197
00:10:32,365 --> 00:10:33,457
Professor.
What?
198
00:10:33,666 --> 00:10:37,659
I'm sorry, this guy's not moving.
I have classes to go to.
199
00:10:38,270 --> 00:10:39,430
Go, fine.
200
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,631
Go kill John Lennon again,
you loser.
201
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,239
He's ruined my study.
202
00:10:45,444 --> 00:10:47,708
He's warped the Duncan Principle.
203
00:10:48,147 --> 00:10:51,412
Damn you,
you outlying piece of datum.
204
00:10:51,617 --> 00:10:55,781
Ow! Aah!
205
00:10:56,922 --> 00:10:58,947
It's you. It's your fault.
206
00:10:59,158 --> 00:11:02,355
But you told me to bring subjects.
Yeah, subjects.
207
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:03,994
Not Rain Man.
208
00:11:04,196 --> 00:11:06,164
I should never have let you
into this lab,
209
00:11:06,365 --> 00:11:08,799
Miss Annie Fanny Panties
In A Bunch.
210
00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:11,936
Oh. Oh, that's so hilarious.
211
00:11:12,138 --> 00:11:14,572
Did you think of that the last time
you skipped a trip to the dentist?
212
00:11:14,774 --> 00:11:17,504
Oh. Let me answer that question
with another question.
213
00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:22,241
It's not fair.
214
00:11:22,448 --> 00:11:24,075
It's not fair.
215
00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:28,510
What are you doing? Stop writing.
216
00:11:28,721 --> 00:11:29,881
Put your... Give me that.
217
00:11:30,089 --> 00:11:33,581
Get out.
Get out, you bunch of dorks.
218
00:11:33,793 --> 00:11:34,817
Get out.
219
00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:41,533
You have destroyed
the Duncan Principle.
220
00:11:47,973 --> 00:11:49,167
Go home.
221
00:11:53,112 --> 00:11:54,511
Cool.
222
00:11:56,248 --> 00:11:57,545
See you.
223
00:11:57,750 --> 00:12:01,083
So, uh, Britta said that you did
a lot of community service.
224
00:12:01,287 --> 00:12:04,518
Ultimate Frisbee
at the Senior's Center. It is amazing.
225
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,090
And what makes Frisbee ultimate?
Ha-ha-ha.
226
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:10,387
Man. If I had a nickel for every time
I wished somebody asked me that.
227
00:12:10,596 --> 00:12:12,393
I'm gonna get dessert.
Want anything?
228
00:12:13,265 --> 00:12:14,789
Carrots.
229
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:16,763
Oh, I'm good.
230
00:12:17,169 --> 00:12:18,830
Hey, you two.
231
00:12:19,038 --> 00:12:21,939
Hey.
Well, that's a cool shirt.
232
00:12:22,141 --> 00:12:24,200
Thank you. Thank you very much.
233
00:12:24,410 --> 00:12:27,379
Where's it from?
Oh. Uh, psh... I don't even know.
234
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:30,140
I guess it's, well... Uh...
235
00:12:30,349 --> 00:12:33,409
Hey, look at that. Hanes Classic.
Oh, that's nice.
236
00:12:33,619 --> 00:12:36,087
You know,
people underestimate the elderly,
237
00:12:36,288 --> 00:12:39,519
but you see these guys out there
and they're throwing the 'bee,
238
00:12:39,725 --> 00:12:41,158
and they're just loving life.
239
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:42,418
It's just inspiring.
240
00:12:42,628 --> 00:12:45,324
You know, I'm gonna really...
I'm gonna think about it.
241
00:12:45,531 --> 00:12:48,022
All right. I'm gonna check on Brits.
242
00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:50,464
See you.
See you.
243
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,564
You're the devil.
I know.
244
00:13:00,813 --> 00:13:02,075
Plus... Okay.
I have a question.
245
00:13:02,281 --> 00:13:04,511
"Where do we go on Saturdays?"
You said, "Sunday."
246
00:13:04,717 --> 00:13:07,618
I have a question for you.
You like Vaughn, right.
247
00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:09,785
Oh, he... he's very cute.
248
00:13:09,989 --> 00:13:13,015
I'm just worried that he's thinking
a little bit more intensely
249
00:13:13,225 --> 00:13:14,692
about this thing than I am.
250
00:13:14,894 --> 00:13:16,521
He says stuff, you know, after...
251
00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:19,887
School?
252
00:13:20,099 --> 00:13:21,464
After...
Dinner mints?
253
00:13:21,667 --> 00:13:24,033
After...
Not having sex.
254
00:13:26,872 --> 00:13:29,773
How was that?
What? Forget that.
255
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:32,671
The problem right now
is that he's calling me "babe."
256
00:13:32,878 --> 00:13:36,678
He's trying to hold my hands.
It's getting a little relationship-y.
257
00:13:36,882 --> 00:13:38,975
And he gave me something.
258
00:13:40,085 --> 00:13:41,985
Herpes?
No.
259
00:13:42,188 --> 00:13:44,679
This.
A poem?
260
00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:46,915
How do I respond
to something like that?
261
00:13:47,126 --> 00:13:48,559
"Thank you?"
262
00:13:48,761 --> 00:13:50,729
Well, it's a very good question.
263
00:13:50,930 --> 00:13:52,625
And it's one I will answer...
264
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,231
Uh... Oh, I'm getting a text.
265
00:13:54,433 --> 00:13:56,867
I'm just gonna read it
if you don't mind.
266
00:13:57,069 --> 00:14:01,631
I am reading it and it is read.
267
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:05,538
Did you ever notice
where the ocean meets the sky?
268
00:14:05,744 --> 00:14:07,041
Did ya?
269
00:14:07,246 --> 00:14:11,546
It's the same wizard blue
That I see in your eye, Britta
270
00:14:13,419 --> 00:14:14,977
Thank you so much.
This has brightened my day.
271
00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:16,984
I'm so glad we can rip
on that dude again.
272
00:14:17,189 --> 00:14:18,417
Look at this. Look at this.
273
00:14:18,624 --> 00:14:21,718
That is the stain of a tear drop
over the word, "rad."
274
00:14:21,927 --> 00:14:23,326
Oh, he said rad.
I thought he said red.
275
00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:25,724
That makes it worse.
Ah, ha-ha-ha-ha.
276
00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:27,262
I'm surprised he can read.
277
00:14:27,833 --> 00:14:29,733
You know?
I know.
278
00:14:30,736 --> 00:14:33,068
Hey, sorry about bailing
on the psych experiment.
279
00:14:33,672 --> 00:14:35,731
That was the experiment, Troy.
280
00:14:35,941 --> 00:14:39,206
We were testing to see how long
people would wait in the room.
281
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:41,003
Whoa.
Oh.
282
00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:42,840
Gotcha.
"Gotcha?"
283
00:14:43,048 --> 00:14:44,606
That's all you have to say?
Yeah.
284
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:48,150
You sat in a room
for 26 straight hours.
285
00:14:48,354 --> 00:14:50,185
Didn't that bother you?
286
00:14:50,389 --> 00:14:52,254
Yeah, I was livid.
Then why didn't you leave?
287
00:14:52,458 --> 00:14:55,086
Because you asked me to stay
and you said we were friends.
288
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,730
Wait.
Is this still part of experiment?
289
00:15:01,934 --> 00:15:03,925
He's more like a puppy
with a fish mouth.
290
00:15:04,136 --> 00:15:05,865
Right, right, right.
It's more like this:
291
00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:09,597
That's right. Laugh it up.
292
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,271
Wanna know what they're doing?
Yeah.
293
00:15:12,478 --> 00:15:15,208
Sure.
Making fun of all of us.
294
00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:20,379
I heard you
with my own Ear-Noculars.
295
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:21,985
Pierce,
we are not making fun of you.
296
00:15:22,187 --> 00:15:23,779
Ah, ha-ha. Calling me Hacky Sack,
297
00:15:23,989 --> 00:15:28,585
and ripping my...
My six pack abs and my moist hair.
298
00:15:28,794 --> 00:15:30,591
And that face you made:
299
00:15:30,796 --> 00:15:32,855
That was pretty obviously Annie.
300
00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:35,590
Okay, this is definitely still part
of the experiment.
301
00:15:35,801 --> 00:15:38,133
Pierce,
we were not making fun of you.
302
00:15:38,337 --> 00:15:40,828
We're making fun of
Britta's boyfriend, Vaughn.
303
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:42,029
Oh, good.
304
00:15:42,241 --> 00:15:45,074
Well, in that case, if we're gonna
do something, let's do it as a team.
305
00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:47,768
I'll get the ball rolling.
Maybe he has a tiny penis.
306
00:15:47,980 --> 00:15:50,210
Who is this guy?
You all have to got to see him.
307
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,145
Everything's all,
"No worries, no worries."
308
00:15:52,351 --> 00:15:54,216
He always says hello
three times in a row.
309
00:15:54,420 --> 00:15:57,878
"Hello, good evening, how are you?"
And look, he wrote a poem.
310
00:15:59,558 --> 00:16:00,855
Can I read it?
We shouldn't show that.
311
00:16:01,060 --> 00:16:02,027
No, no, it's fine.
312
00:16:02,227 --> 00:16:03,455
So I'll be done in like an hour?
313
00:16:03,662 --> 00:16:04,788
Yeah, no worries.
314
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:06,828
He just said it.
315
00:16:07,032 --> 00:16:08,522
Guys, you've met Vaughn, right?
316
00:16:08,734 --> 00:16:10,463
Hey, what's up? Hi.
317
00:16:13,706 --> 00:16:14,695
Ha-ha. What a fool.
318
00:16:14,907 --> 00:16:18,104
This group's got a case
of the giggles, huh? Heh.
319
00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:19,777
Wait, is that?
320
00:16:22,247 --> 00:16:24,909
Did you give them my poem?
No.
321
00:16:25,117 --> 00:16:27,711
Okay, well, why's the dinosaur
rocking a picture of my poem?
322
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,319
Here, read it.
323
00:16:31,623 --> 00:16:35,650
Ha. You guys are...
You guys laughing at me, aren't you?
324
00:16:35,861 --> 00:16:37,226
Yeah.
No.
325
00:16:37,429 --> 00:16:39,522
That's, uh... Wow.
326
00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:45,296
This is the least tight thing
that's ever happened to me.
327
00:16:49,274 --> 00:16:51,139
I can't believe you.
328
00:16:51,343 --> 00:16:53,004
Honestly, Jeff, how dare you?
329
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:59,075
I can hear him outside. He's crying.
330
00:17:01,453 --> 00:17:02,886
Now, he's barking.
331
00:17:05,224 --> 00:17:06,714
Jeff, wait,
I'm sorry I sold you out.
332
00:17:06,925 --> 00:17:07,949
Britta is never gonna forgive me.
333
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:09,889
I can't believe
I showed you that poem.
334
00:17:10,095 --> 00:17:12,222
Oh, my God,
my life is Degrassi High.
335
00:17:12,431 --> 00:17:15,025
Oh, Jeff.
I have a gossip problem.
336
00:17:15,234 --> 00:17:17,498
I stir the pot, Jeff. I'm a pot stirrer.
337
00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:20,001
This isn't the only study group
I've had this year.
338
00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:21,729
You see those ladies over there?
339
00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:25,275
I used to be in their group
until they kicked me out.
340
00:17:25,477 --> 00:17:26,910
They called me Tattle-ina.
341
00:17:27,112 --> 00:17:30,741
It's a bumblebee nickname.
It's cute, but it stings.
342
00:17:32,484 --> 00:17:34,714
Hey, look at the size
of that woman's earrings.
343
00:17:35,187 --> 00:17:37,519
It's like little dogs
should be jumping through them.
344
00:17:39,591 --> 00:17:41,388
Look at them.
This has to end. Mm-mm-mm.
345
00:17:41,593 --> 00:17:43,220
Shirley, don't do this.
346
00:17:43,429 --> 00:17:45,397
Look, we can still hang out.
347
00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:48,430
It's just, you know,
we won't bag on people.
348
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:50,067
Come on, Jeff.
What are we gonna talk about?
349
00:17:50,269 --> 00:17:51,896
My kids, your...
Your doctor career?
350
00:17:52,471 --> 00:17:55,463
I was a lawyer.
See, I'm already bored.
351
00:17:57,643 --> 00:17:59,110
Well...
352
00:17:59,945 --> 00:18:02,914
We'll always have tiny nipples.
Heh-heh-heh. They were tiny.
353
00:18:04,516 --> 00:18:05,608
Jeff. Wait, wait.
354
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:09,345
I know I shouldn't do this,
but one last little piece of gossip.
355
00:18:11,290 --> 00:18:14,885
Britta told me
she had a sex dream about you.
356
00:18:15,961 --> 00:18:17,326
You still have a chance.
357
00:18:18,697 --> 00:18:20,892
Mm-mm! Mm. Mm-mm.
Details.
358
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,160
Details. Details.
359
00:18:26,538 --> 00:18:29,098
Abed, here.
360
00:18:29,741 --> 00:18:32,005
I wanted to say sorry
for yelling at you.
361
00:18:36,248 --> 00:18:39,149
Indiana Jones, cool.
I just got you the first three because...
362
00:18:39,351 --> 00:18:41,581
The fourth one blows.
363
00:18:42,688 --> 00:18:43,916
We're cool.
Britta.
364
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:46,819
I do not want to talk to you.
No, I know, and I'm sorry.
365
00:18:47,025 --> 00:18:49,755
I'm really sorry.
I'm really, really sorry.
366
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:52,658
And I will go talk to Vaughn...
Vaughn broke up with me.
367
00:18:52,865 --> 00:18:54,526
Oh! Oh.
368
00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:56,963
You broke my trust. You suck.
369
00:18:57,169 --> 00:18:58,158
I know and I'm sorry.
370
00:18:58,370 --> 00:19:00,201
But I was in a tough position.
371
00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:02,971
I couldn't handle
just being one of the girls.
372
00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:07,804
What do you wanna be?
373
00:19:08,013 --> 00:19:09,241
Is...
374
00:19:09,448 --> 00:19:13,851
Is there a spot on the friendship
spectrum between total stranger
375
00:19:14,052 --> 00:19:16,111
and having to hear
about the guys you date?
376
00:19:16,755 --> 00:19:19,053
And, ideally, just a notch
underneath driving you
377
00:19:19,258 --> 00:19:20,725
to the airport
and painting your kitchen.
378
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:23,417
How about the friend level
where you sometimes have to cat sit?
379
00:19:23,629 --> 00:19:24,618
Done.
380
00:19:25,931 --> 00:19:28,900
And if I'm occasionally naked
in your dreams, I won't complain.
381
00:19:29,101 --> 00:19:31,035
Shirley.
I know, she's got a problem.
382
00:19:31,236 --> 00:19:32,965
She stirs the pot.
She's a pot stirrer.
383
00:19:34,873 --> 00:19:36,238
Sorry, dudes.
384
00:19:36,441 --> 00:19:38,068
No worries, man.
385
00:19:38,277 --> 00:19:41,405
Uh... some worries, man.
Some worries.
386
00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:45,815
Whoa.
387
00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:52,991
Shirley would've said something
funny about that guy.
388
00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:55,983
Oh, Jeff, oh. Heh-heh-heh.
389
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:57,423
Oh, no.
390
00:19:57,629 --> 00:20:00,097
Pierce, Pierce,
give me your ear thing.
391
00:20:00,299 --> 00:20:02,199
Got rid of it.
392
00:20:04,703 --> 00:20:09,106
You see, Jeff, there are certain things
man was not meant to hear.
393
00:20:09,308 --> 00:20:12,869
We were designed
by whatever entity you choose
394
00:20:13,312 --> 00:20:16,179
to hear what's in this range.
395
00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:18,178
And really this range alone.
396
00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:21,045
Because, you know
who's talking to us in this range.
397
00:20:22,387 --> 00:20:23,877
The people we love.
398
00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:35,028
He must've heard us call him
Inspector Gadget.
399
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,300
Oh, I think it's time for Burning Man.
400
00:20:40,505 --> 00:20:42,973
Oh, I'm Saddam Hussein. Oh.
401
00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:45,272
Nice to meet you, dude.
402
00:20:45,477 --> 00:20:48,139
Oh, wow, I love
reading and being a desperate housewife.
403
00:20:48,347 --> 00:20:51,714
Hey, man, coming
through, I love the Desperate Housewives.
404
00:20:53,585 --> 00:20:55,246
I'm Dr. Doogie Seacrest.
405
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:58,416
I think I'm better
than everyone else because I'm 40.
406
00:20:58,624 --> 00:21:00,524
I'm not 40.
407
00:21:01,126 --> 00:21:03,890
I can hear you through the window,
morons.
408
00:21:06,465 --> 00:21:10,231
Just pretend like you asleep.
Just pretend like you were sleeping.